Diagnosis

Hi 

It is a very difficult consultation when you hear surgery is not currently an option . It was certainly the worst appointment my mum ever had. However when we had a look at the research it was strongly leaning  going straight to chemo and with good reason . Not only can it get to work on the existing spread it can also reign in any stray cells . Although surgery is currently not recommended they do so many rounds of chemo then rescan , regroup and see what other options are possible. This was exactly the pathway my mum had . A lot of people feel sad , we did too, when chemo is proposed. Surgery feels as though it has slipped off the table . However chemotherapy for some people can be a very powerful treatment. It removed my mum’s tumours from being visible on the scan .

I also worried chemotherapy was not imminent but they were pretty relaxed about it . Said it had probably been there for a long time so to have a holiday if she wished . Funnily enough it was not something she had thought about .

It will take you time to find your feet after today , and take all the time you need . Have another wee read of my mum’s story and the pathway she had . Give you a bit of encouragement onwards . 
Some people have been having chemo for years and it would surprise you what they can still do . It takes time to get the balance right with dosage etc but with time it can be achieved .

So here’s to a speedy appointment and significant shrinkage when chemo starts . So when you tell others you are telling them the best treatment approach just now for you . My mum did eventually get her bowel tumour , over ten liver mets over two years and a lung met surgically removed .
Take special care and lots of love and strength.

Court 

Thank you Court for your kind words of encouragement. Thank to Macmillan, I’ve gained a lot of insight into my condition. Of course we had all hoped it had been a lucky break and caught it early. But that was not to be. I now must trust the oncologists to give me the chemo or whatever to take on the cancer. 

The day after diagnosis and referral and I must say, a restless night. I’ve read through some past comments and they are generally uplifting. With all docs and nurses wearing face masks I must say it draws attention to their eyes. Even the consultant yesterday couldn’t hide his distress at passing on the unwanted news. I guess my eyes showed bemusement and bewilderment not to mention fear. Perhaps I shouldn’t let it worry me too much as it’s not a nice part of their job.

Hi 

I found the surgeons very compassionate. I could literally see one surgeon’s shoulders drop an inch after he had exhausted himself making sure we understood the implications of one surgery . But it made me think he must genuinely care ! That’s got to be good !

The first few weeks are rough on all the family but there are people that I fixed my eyes on who were ahead of my mum on the journey with an extensive spread that responded well to treatment and still doing well today . The hope lies in you being a statistic of one and it’s only your response to treatment that really matters . A lot new treatments are available today that were never around ten years ago . 

Hope you got a bit of a rest today . 
Court 

A week on from diagnosis and waiting for first oncology appointment. As my anxiety builds my Fitbit resting heart rate is a bit of a yoyo. We just took a break to visit our son and family ... might not get another opportunity for some time. Anxiety level dropped considerably as I almost forgot my diagnosis. Now back home I have to ring the oncology Macmillan nurse. I must admit I bottled it today but tomorrow I have to do it, knowing the anxiety will rise again. What I really need to know is when is treatment likely to begin and what will it be.