Early last week I had diarrhea and thought I had probs overwiped as there was bright red blood on toilet paper and felt sore in anal and perineum area... fast forward to Monday this week and there was still a lot of pain and stinging and it was actually worse so I had a look with mirror and I could see a protruding fleshy mass towards back so I thought probs a haemarroid (or maybe a tumour as it doesn’t really match haemarroid pics) it’s basically a loose fleshy flap of skin, but also perineum looked like there were small tears and there were also quite a few white blisters/spots on one side of anal crack and the other side looks very puff, raw and red
I’ve had blood on toilet tissue for years but never worried as I am a bit of an over wiper but was horrified at what I’ve found... could cry as the haemarroid looking thing I’ve found is one thing but the blood on toilet paper, the white blisters and weird looking torn perineum have me terrified I’ve been ignoring something for years and am only taking notice now as pain starts in latter stages or something 
- the pain is crazy, like stinging and as though I'm sitting on broken glass
I saw a nurse practitioner at GP on Monday and when she had a look she said wow I can see why you are in so much pain. She said she could see what looked like blisters all around the perineal area of the anus lining and she said the lump was really unsual (not what you want to hear). She said it was quite big and fleshy as I had described, not firm and thrombosed as she would have been expecting for an external pile but she also said she wasn't confident it was a skin tag either due to where it is coming down from and its appearance. She has given me steroids and a numbing cream and I have to go back this coming Monday and she said if there isn't much improvement she will have to refer to hospital as they can't diagnose any further at GPs. She said the blisters and broken, inflamed looking skin are odd as they aren't just around the lump so it can't just be that, that is irritating the lining.
I was kinda upset as had expected to be told it was a pile and a bit of chafing from over wiping but just worse than usual maybe... I pushed her saying but you don't think cancer right and all she would say was lets chat on Monday so I can see if any changes and I'll maybe have a chat with a Doc next week. I pushed it again and she said well given your age, lack of risk factors, family history and how rare anal cancer is we aren't jumping to that conclusion yet, it could just be an unusual pile or skin tag given you had diarrhea last week and are only just coming here after that. It was at this point I added that I have had blood on toilet paper when wiping for at least 10-12 years and she was a bit silent, said she would add that to notes but that surely I would have noticed if had been anything like it is for long. In all honesty though I have had pain to some extent wiping over the years and just ignored it until now when the pain is extreme, I can hardly walk or sit!
Just scary that she woundn't commit to telling me its likely nothing and you do hear of ppl only coming forward to get something looked at when in extreme pain and its too late - just so, so scared and in pain to the point where I can hardly bear to sit on my chair at work (I do a desk job) and I'm finding it hard to even move round the office
