D day tomorrow & I'm scared!

Dear Croccy

The waiting is tough. It sounds as though you’re doing well and your children’s love is very precious. The oncology meetings can flash past in a blur. You might find it helps to take a notebook, to slow them down. To differentiate between what they may have discovered so far, and what comes next. Whether it’s more scans, or a treatment plan. And critical to get a date or at least timing for your next meeting. 

There has been so much progress in treating cancer, and any stats you may have seen just haven’t kept up - they reflect only the options that existing x years ago. My treatment last year has only been in use since my original diagnosis on 2018, it wasn’t available back then! 

If you’re able, I hope you’ll share the outcome of the 6 March meeting with us so we can continue to support you, and share any relevant experiences. For now, there is today and all it brings, and plenty to hope for each and every day. 

Hi Croccy and just wanted to send you some positive vibes for tomorrow. As Wellspring says, take someone with you and a pen and paper and jot down any questions that you have. I was introduced to my Colorectal Support Nurse at my meeting and she met with me straight after to go through everything again to make sure I understood things.

The cancer diagnosis will not change but they will discuss your treatment plan with you and then you can get cracked on with getting rid of the tumour. There may be some tough times ahead but we’re here to help and support you through them

Take care

Karen x

Hi Croccy,

I would also suggest you take someone with you. My situation was a little different as I didn’t receive confirmed diagnosis until after surgery but like you I had to wait weeks for confirmation. I remember my meeting well, I meet the colorectal nurse and she went through tumour staging and grading. I was then informed that I would be offered chemotherapy. Try and stay positive, it definitely helps. 

please update us

Rachael x

Hi

im 43, with two children (21 and 1!) diagnosed with 3cm bowel cancer in Jan which had spread to liver. I was floored by this. Like you no symptoms except anaemia for me but put it down to pregnancy. I can’t even begin to explain also how I felt and still do. I feel like it’s a nightmare I can’t wake up from. Every day since that diagnosis has changed. My life isn’t the same anymore and I’m trying to accept that. 

 I am having chemo (6 cycles of folfox every two weeks)and then surgery in June time providing chemo shrinks cancer.

I am on cycle 2, it has been hard for a few days of each cycle, mainly nausea, horrid taste in mouth and throat, tiredness and neuropathy but it’s manageable. This cycle has been the worst so far but I am ok to endure short term yuckiness for long term gain! It’s ok and you can do it. Depends on the chemo for hair loss. Not for me either but I think folfox is one you don’t lose your hair.

I have a one year old which although is my strength it’s also harder I think as I can’t bear the thought of not being here for her. I am also due to get married in May. I have had to postpone wedding (for the 5th time - previous covid cancellations!) due to surgery and also, I want to be in a better place. I’ll be due to scans and surgery then so not great timing for a wedding!

It is a rollercoaster of emotions. And tbh only time will help - I have found that expressing my emotions when I need to, talking about it, educating myself on only reputable websites and reaffirming my oncologists words help. Operable and curative intent.

Keep your head where your body is at. Remember that at ALL times 

Don’t wander into the world of what ifs, they don’t exist. Only focus on the facts you have in front of you, don’t google!

we are all stronger than we think and time will show that.

E

It is all such a terrible shock in the beginning. As others have said, having someone with you can help, taking notes (my husband barely remembers some of the things that are said in those meetings), and giving yourself space to ask questions can help. I wish you all the best for the meeting today. This site is a real help, and shows that we are not alone. People get through and the support here really helps. 

 Croccy , hope you got a good plan to go forward with. Things will probably start happening all at once now. Take care

Hi you will honestly feel so much better after your appointment because there will be a plan in place. Even if the news isn't what you hope for, bowel cancer is very treatable even if there is spread. 

We have 5 grandchildren aged 5 to 10 and we told them that Grandad had cancer and found a cartoon on you tube of someone with a stoma to show them what he would be having. Once he came home some of them were curious and wanted to see his bag and others just looked at a spare bag to see what it looked like. 

Kids are remarkably resilient and we felt it was better to be honest with them and not hide stuff incase they heard someone else discuss Mikes prognosis, we wanted them to hear it from us so that we could answer any questions honestly. 

They now make jokes about Grandads " bum on his belly" especially if it makes noises. They have all coped really well and helped us get through treatment with their positive energy. 

Good luck with everything. ♡ 

Hi All,

I'm hoping you can all see this reply (im not sure if you are notified or not), please let me know or react just to show me that you can read this please. 

Sorry about the late reply. All of you have been fantastic & I appreciate you all replying to my initial post.

Right the latest, I had my d-day meeting last Wednesday. It was very scary & when the consultant called me in my heart sank & I thought this is my life now the next few mins will determine this.

The consultant sat down & started to speak he then had a little pause & started to study the pics of my colonoscopy (as i could see his computer screen). Tears started to roll down my cheek. He started speaking again & said the words 'it's been caught early which is good news'. This is all i wanted to hear at that point.

He then went into more detail which what he was telling me was all new to me so i did stop him occasionally to as questions to clarify what he was saying. The consultant did a very good job in a difficult situation. I left feeling like a millionaire, I've got a chance I've got hope. To keep it simple I have to have an operation to have part of my Bowell removed, which doesn't sound very nice. He thinks i may not need chemo after this but couldn't say for certain as he said let's have the op & if successful then hopefully all good .

I then had a meeting/chat with the specialist nurse who again were very good & we talked about anything what I wanted to speak about but also the information they had to relay to me regarding the future path.

It's a great outcome & the I think the best outcome I could of wished for. I have hope that is all you need, hope.

From this, I want you all to take hope from my current experience as it can happen even when your thinking the worst, for the 2 weeks prior to this meeting that's all I could think about & yes it was the worst is all i could think as it's difficult not to.

Forgot to mention I have no date for the op but a date approx was mentioned mid-end of April.

Thanks for reading & bye for now.

Take care all,

Blu

Hi Croccy and thank you for the update. What a great news, fingers crossed that you don’t need chemotherapy afterwards.

I had successful surgery in November 23 but was still offered chemotherapy due to lymph node involvement.

Hope you get an operation date soon.

Rachael x

Hi Croccy 

I found myself in a similar situation to you.  My GP was able to detect the tumour on examination.   And it took weeks to see hospital surgeon and then the surgeon ordered tests.   Those confirmed cancer.   

Waiting for a diagnosis and treatment is never easy I found relaxation and relationships helped through the period of waiting.  

Im hoping that your wait won’t be long and as I have been told here many times bowel cancer is a slow processing disease and more importantly very treatable. 

Wishing you all the very best.