Husbands rectal cancer

Hi A48

I haven’t been through the same but wanted to send you a hug. 
You definitely want to get that out and there will be support afterwards. He’s so young to be facing this and must feel frightened 

Take care 

Hi is the surgery called APR? 

Yes it is. 

Hi A48 . If you type Apr or coccyx in the search box at the top of the screen then it will bring up previous posts. If you look at Katz51 profile page and perhaps Eddiestomart might be able to offer some advice too? x

Hi, I had this surgery in December and I'm currently 6 weeks post surgery. It is big surgery but doable and I remember reading all the possible effects and feeling terrified too but they need to tell you all possibilities. I took a knee support cushion in with me which kept me more comfortable while laying on my side to keep pressure of the bottom wound. As soon as I had a date for surgery I kept as active as I could, I think this helped mentally and physically. Sending you and your husband lots of best wishes x

Hi A48

Thats some journey for someone so young. 

I had APR surgery on the 4th Feb 2021 so my stoma "Eddie" is almost two years old, and I am happy to say that he and I live a very good life. I was 57 when I got the shock diagnosis of colorectal cancer, and that (due to the site of my two tumours), I couldn't have radiotherapy, or chemo to try to solve the issue. I had to have what is major surgery, and life changing. I won't lie, the news hit me like a sledgehammer and I had a cry. However, I am a very positive and pragmatic guy, and decided that I WOULD survive, and deal with it.

I got myself as fit as I could prior to surgery.

There are potential complications and implications with the APR surgery in terms of bladder control and impotency, but I came out of hospital with full control of my bladder. The incisions at the back and the other connections are potentially more of a problem and some do suffer impotency I'm told, but (after several months) I now have regained my abilities in that area, and so it may be that patience is needed, and I hope all goes well for you in that dept. My girlfriend has been fantastic through it all.

Without wishing to cause anxiety, I would say that it's best to go into the surgery with a positive attitude, as there's no doubt that this is not to be taken lightly. The surgery is invasive, the wounds quite dramatic (my bum looked like a cornish pasty for some time), and the recovery is not short, but YOU CAN DO IT. You will support each other and get through it. I did.

Take the painkillers!

I have a defiant and humourous slant on the whole thing and have posted many poems on here in the Express Yourself forum that may help you to get through the dark times.

There are also many on here that have gone through/are going through similar and it's a good place to come if you need to talk/vent.

I wish you both good fortune and strength as you navigate the journey together.

Cancer shows no respect

Doesn't care who you are

Doesn't take just

the wicked

Doesn't set any bar

No colour

No creed

Can escape its blight

But for us all

The tunnel has light

The human mind

Powerful and strong

Can defeat the invader

Send it where it belongs

When you feel lost

When you need a hand

Put your thoughts on here

We can help make a stand

A tear is ok

A fear expected

Your allies are here

To see cancer rejected!!!!

You think you can make me doubt my survival

You think you can rival

The force that lives within me

Can't you see

I'm a fighter

I will not give in

Submit

To your loathsome disease

I'm at ease

With my strength

My will

You will not kill

I will overcome

You will be done

I will not perish

I will cherish

My future so bright

My day is not night

My sunshine has not turned to rain

I've everything to gain

I'll live life to the full

And see out my days

In the sun’s rays

Thanks for the advice and support! Luckily hubbie has kept himself fit and although he’s worried we know that once this is over we can hopefully start the recovery. He’s told the surgeon he’s going snowboarding next year so he can remove the coccyx as he keeps falling in it! Not sure I’m going to be able to look at a Cornish pasty in the same way again ha ha

Excellent attitude LOL. I got my six pack back (ish), it just comes with it's own little "man bag" now. 

I've just had two sessions of training for self irrigation and this will lead to an even easier life as I'll be able to plan any output to suit whatever I'm doing. Wouldn't want to leave a trail on the piste after all!!!

When's the op?

Richard

He’s on the waiting list and they’ve said in about a week but you know what the bed situation in hospital is like at the moment. Just read him your message. He loved it! Thank you for showing us some light at the end of this long tunnel! 

Always light, no matter what tunnel.