So, Had Willam and Nicole at our house today just to keep them in the picture as to what is happening with Jay. William seemed really calm again and that really worries me, but he seemed to take it ok. We just said we don't actually know how it's going to go and its possible his dad might still be here this time next year. Have to now sell our beloved caravan that will have to go unfortunately. It's breaking our heart having to do that because it's in such a beautiful spot and we have been spoiled with the pitch we have. You need a car to get to where it is, and I can't drive so it's hopeless keeping it on. William and Nicole don't want it- not their scene, I think. Had so many visions of taking the wee one over there for holidays this was one of Jay's goals when she got up a bit. She's 2 years old now so at a good age. It may come to it that he won't be able to drive himself, so he's arranged as well for William to take our car when that time comes. He has his own can which he has out on the PCP programme so Jay has said to him to hand it back and take ours but not at this moment in time because we need it. Just feels so surreal now that we are putting all these things into place and more or less watching all our hopes and dreams slip away. It's true what they say you just don't know what you've got til it's gone. I am just hoping and praying that they will be able to give him this new form of chemo and it will work for him. They don't know if they can and will only do it if they think he is fit enough to do it. William said to him today as I have said he should try to get himself up and moving instead of sitting in a chair all day and get outside but Jay keeps saying `he can't` but I've seen him get up and go into the kitchen to make himself a cup of tea go to the bathroom etc and he can still get in and out of bed. I don't know if he really can't.or he has just given up already.
Vicky x
