Tired of smiling

Hi Africa1

Thanks for putting your thoughts up for us all to reflect on.

I’m not going to fill this space with my woes but I have come to the conclusion that people that ask my husband and I how we are only hear fine thank you. They are so full of their lives they don’t give it a second thought.

Years ago my son was in a spinal unit, my daughter was meant to be taking her mocks. As you can imagine life was challenging, I stayed in Salisbury my hubby with our daughter. The people that helped then are the ones there for us now and I can tell them exactly how we are. 
I remember my mother in law was in her fifties and was very popular every time she went anywhere she had a barrage of well wishes. People actually didn’t do her shopping for her they expected her out about and smiling. 
Once she was stage four when anyone asked her how she was her reply was,

“I am well apart from the cancer”.

She was a strong character and I thought it a little insensitive. Now I can see where she’ was coming from 

Hope you all have a good day. 

Remember you don’t have to smile x

Hi Vicky 

I had the Bupa counselling sessions through Macmillan and my lovely counsellor offered to speak to us both.

Sarah xx

Thank you so much Sarah. 

We're just waiting for someone to get back to us. Spoke to a welfare adviser here yesterday she had left a message on my mobile it was just to see if we could apply for the grant thing MacMillan do to help with certain costs but unfortunately, we don't qualify. Jay gets his state pension and also attendance allowance and I get carers allowance for him so when it all adds up seems we are over the threshold. Sitting here freezing. We got a new gas central heating boiler installed at the beginning of last month or old one was from `the ark` and it was one of those old floor standing ones- but it worked! Was told though that parts to repair it were becoming more and more obsolete and if it broke down may be really hard to source parts for it so bit the bullet and got a shiny new one. First of all due to a change in water pressure (the pressure on this one is more powerful) one of the radiators burst so as we have heating service cover we got a new radiator fitted free of charge. Then a couple of weeks later I noticed the floorboards on our laminate flooring had warped slightly then there was puddle just under the radiator engineer came out and looked at it only to tell us this one had burst too and so isolated it so it wouldn't drip anymore that was over a week ago and we are still waiting on a new radiator said they're waiting on new stocks coming in. So, engineer turned up with 2 electric fan heaters to keep us going for now just hope they don't run up the electric much. So, this is something else to add to the traumas we're going through just now. Any other time we could have just shrugged this off but it just seems to have exacerbated things. Thanks again Sarah.

Vicky x

Having a lovely little chuckle to myself - you've made me realise that when i often look god awful, it's actually a blessing - there is no way they think I'm fine . So in turn only helps everyone talk openly.

Think I'll count my blessings

Hi, Africa1, did you get to speak to the counselor yesterday? I hope you found it useful. We are all here too xx

Hello sorry for the late reply , my phone was sulking . Yes I did and it was hard but I think talking things thro will help a lot as long as I'm open and not hiding behind smiles . I'll have 6 sessions in all so will let you know how things go. Take care gentle virtual hugs xx

Thank you Artsie Ann , we're lucky to have each other on this side to share and support each other ar'n't we Have a lovely gentle weekend to come . Xxx 

Thanks Africa1 

Im not in a smiley faced mood today. I’ve had a set back and it’s getting me down.

But if asked I have said. Not put a grin on I’ve just spoken just the truth.

It actually felt good.

It’s liberating! 

Hope you have a gentle weekend too xxx

Wow that's great , it's hard isn't it but that's my path too from now on .Have a lovely weekend and let us giving honesty as we'd expect it from others xx

Keep.  lol my brain says bed time