Sorry for long post.
When my husband had his initial diagnosis the surgeon said that he would be very nervous of operating on him as he was worried he would not pull through due to his general health.
My husband is 79, has kidney failure, diabetes, an enlarged heart and atrial fibrillation.
His mobility is poor in as much as he cannot walk that far without either being breathless or his legs aching.
The surgeon said he would get an anaesthetist and cardiologist to review but was pretty sure it would be no.
Move on a few weeks and he has had a pre-op assessment, has an echocardiogram this week and has the impression from the specialist nurse that the op might now go ahead. He hasn’t had a date but has been given carbohydrate drinks to take the day before.
His tumour is 3 cm and he has no symptoms at all, it has not spread, at initial meeting he was told it was very possible it was slow growing and the chances were he would die with it rather than of it by the nurse so maybe no treatment wasn’t so bad as we could possibly have 2/3 or maybe even 5 years to enjoy life. Obviously this cannot be guaranteed as it might spread.
However the surgeon said if it blocks the bowel he would die a painful death. This is the sentence he seems to be focusing on.
Now to the question. With his general health if he does have the surgery which would be open rather than keyhole and he would have a stoma what would recovery be like? He is not one to fight an illness (for example when he was given exercises from physio to help his weak legs he didn’t do them). He struggles at present to climb the stairs to bed in the evening, he can’t put his socks on. Will he be able to drive afterwards, I suppose I am saying how long to get back to how he is now.
I am nervous he will have the op but his quality of life will be compromised but all he can think about is a possible ‘painful death’.
Thank you for reading this far.
Pauline
Hi Pauline
its such a worry for you both.
This is a great place to have lots of support and advice
I was quite fit before my op so I am unable to give advice on his health. Because I was fit I was told that they would through everything at me. I was slightly daunted. Mine was low rectal cancer which was four inches and caused increasing discomfort. I found that most of the day was sat on the toilet for a ribbon stool. I lacked energy as I found it difficult to eat healthily
My husbands friends Dad refused the op in his fifties and did have an awful time his son was really angry that he wouldn’t have the operation with a stoma! It was his choice though but tough on his family
My husband bought me liquid meal substitutes Complan type I had three snack meals a day (easy to process) and two drinks. This had a remarkable affect on my energy levels. I was able to do the pelvic floor exercises and prepare for the operation. If your husband doesn’t do the exercises at least he may have more energy though I know that Complan may not be suitable with his health there’s other protein drinks available that are more apt.
They fit my op around my fitness which I am sure they will do for your husband.
When I woke I felt my stoma and was just so relieved that tumour was in the bin. The continual pressure in my back passage was gone.
Within six weeks I was staying away, my diet was becoming more varied. In no time I ate what I wanted and travelled abroad. Though sweetcorn was a big miss for me it’s not for many. Skins, seeds etc are to be avoided nuts also can cause blocking.
The stoma gave me freedom
That was last August I am now reversed and back on my stodgy beige diet! It’s no bother I have found if I put stodgy in that’s what I get out. I have introduced some soft leaves and spinach and see how I go.
The discomfort of that tumour is still fresh in my mind, the bleeding I had towards the end was frightening they said that as I was passing a stool it bled. I despised that thing in me and wanted it out! I was told I would block so things moved quickly for me
I hope that you have more details from your team about what operation they are planning. and your husbands health improves. You could contact the colorectal nurses I found them supportive and informative they will up to speed.
Keep us updated.
Ann
Hi Pauline
Yes I fully understand and it’s a difficult choice to make.
I thought I had piles for ten years and mine was huge though non aggressive thank goodness!
If you had a chat with your nurses they maybe able to tell you what operation they have planned. I found out by phoning my nurses they told me over the phone and gave me the recommended website to look it up. I was all over the place until I found out and it gave me the information I needed
I had a long surgery however there’s many options it could be a quicker recovery op.
Im sending you a hug
Ann
Thank you I will give them a ring tomorrow. 
Hi Ali Bali
My surgeon told me six months. I thought No way I’ll do it in three. He was the right!
My surgery also was very invasive. Keyhole , open surgery to lift my bowel out and remove the tumour. My stoma was flat and I had a few wobbles early days.
I had heavy pain meds for at least two months. Tramadol slow release ! I tried coming off like the hospital told me but I was in a lot of pain. My GP said I shouldn’t be in pain as it was stopping my moving about and resting
I found that I benefited from power naps. These lessened and I could go out and about between my naps. At least two naps a day. Pelvic floor exercises twice daily. Gentle to begin with Night times were uncomfortable so I needed to rest during the day Just going upstairs was tiring!
Six weeks I stayed away and had a wonderful time
But six months to be better than ever
It sounds as though your surgery was invasive and you need time to recover. Try and eat healthily and rest as much as you can.
Once you can have a good nights sleep you will feel so much better.
Drinking fluids is really important with a stoma, I dehydrated quickly feeling light headed, headache and generally unwell. I drank isotonic at least once a day. The cheaper alternative and six pints of weak squash. Yes that sounds mad now but spread across the day it kept me going. I was told with an Ileostomy I needed to up my sugar and salt intake.
I hope that you feel better soon
We are all individual and all need to be treated as such some are out running around with paracetamols I thought I was tough and would be like that in reality I felt like I’d been hit by a bus and I had to listen to my body and do what it needed
I hope you find my experience helpful it is long but so is the recovery for some
As court says please join the stoma support that was the reason I joined here I was in a right pickle with it I had so much support and advice it made the world of difference
Take care
Ann
Yes Pauline it’s concerning and I would feel the same. You don’t want regrets
I had increasingly worsening symptoms so I really had no choice.
Find out what they intend to do. There’s all kinds of treatment available.
They may be able to monitor it and act if it starts to grow quickly. I’m not medical but it would be good for you to talk openly to the team
Ann
