The start of my mums journey

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So having been a very fit and active person until now ... my mum is recovering from bowel surgery last month and is now living with a colostomy bag. Last week we had the devastating news that she'll need chemotherapy as well but also need to find out if its spread. Its all happening very fast with a PET scan scheduled for tomorrow and first oncology appointment on Friday.

I reached out to Macmillan on the weekend and cried for the first 5 minutes without saying a word - eventually when I composed myself what a great support they were.

I need to find the strength to get my mum through this first part - she's absolutely terrified of what they will find. Im trying to be strong for the whole family but its not my body and I need to understand what thoughts she may be having and how she's feeling at the start of this journey

Kareno62 over 2 years ago

Hi SJ0672 and a warm welcome to the board - I’m so glad you reached out to the support desk for help. I think the best way to know how your mum is feeling is to gently ask her? A cancer diagnosis throws up a whole host of emotions - shock, fear, confused, anxious. Is she coping with the colostomy ok? There’s a separate page for stoma support and everyone shares advice and top tips

https://community.macmillan.org.uk/cancer_experiences/ileostomy-and-colostomy-discussions-forum

Chemo isn’t nice but it’s doable and there’s lots of pills and potions to combat any side effects. Try to encourage your mum to eat well and there’s no harm in putting a bit of weight on before chemo. Is she able to take a bit of exercise? Just a short walk to start with then build up a little each day? I’m going to attach a link to a post that we started about chemo - it may sound a bit scary when you read it but remember that not everyone suffers badly with the side effects and it’s unlikely that your mum would get every single one

https://community.macmillan.org.uk/cancer_types/bowel-colon-rectum-cancer-forum/f/general/221768/chemo-care-top-tips--

They may or may not find anything from the PET scan but please come back after you have the results and we’ll be able to help you further.

Ifs hard being strong for everyone but to be able to do that you need to look after yourself too so try to make time to treat yourself and meet up with friends

Take care

Karen x

Macmillan Support Line - 0808 808 00 00, 7 days a week between 8am-8pm