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Hi, my hubby was diagnosed with advanced prostate cancer 7 years ago, already spread extensively through the bone, including the spine. He did great for years, on two clinical trials. They're in the past, as is chemo. He's now on radium-223 and he is  rapidly deteriorating. His quality of life has plummeted to rubbish, there's so little he is able to do. The pain is a constant battle, and the changes to both our lives are monumental.

I feel very bewildered at the thought of what is to come. District Nurses do the medical things, but how do I get him out of bed, dress and wash him, he is so much heavier than I am. He wants to die at home. I'm worried about the practicalities of me coping with this. When Mum and Dad had dementia, we had to pay for these type of care calls. Is it the same with cancer? I don't think I have the finances!

Someone said to me to apply for continuing health care, fast track, end of life. Google says the referral needs to be initiated by a clinician, but the hospital have never heard of it. Has anyone else come across this? I did apply for a similar thing for my parents, but was refused, along with almost everyone else.

I just wondered if anyone can shed any light on this?

  • Hi there. I'm sorry you find yourself in this situation.  My cancer recently spread to my liver and I had a lot of pain. My MacMillan nurse at the hospital put me in touch with the  palliative care team at the hospice where my husband or kids or myself can call 24/7 for any help we may need. You can ask the oncologist to refer you or your cancer care nurse. I hope you get this sorted out, I know only too well the struggle as my husband has multiple sclerosis and there is nothing available for me so I have had to call his friends at times when he's fallen as I'm too weak to get him up. 

    I hope I've helped. Take care and good luck. 

    Lils x
  • Hi Summer Wine, I'm sorry to read about you problems, Lily0403 is right about contacting Macmillan, I don't know you full situation but there is an other trial going on with positive results, uses modified cold sore virus, you could ask about that as well.

    All the best Ulls