Amusing Hospital Stories

I've mentioned this before, but for those who have not heard it.

Getting ready for my first TURBT, I put the gown on and put the paper undies on my head, thinking it was a paper hat. The nurse nearly wet herself when she saw me. "No Love, other end " she said. Well, I had only ever seen operations on Holby City. 

Straight out of Carry On Nurse

xx

Smiles here after reading this story same smile after reading Inanna harryx

 Great thread Inanna, lift our spirits.

Haha Rily 

I had great difficulty trying to put the hospital gown on & assumed they'd changed the style to some new modern wrap around with just the one arm.  So I put my one arm in & kept trying to fling the gown around myself in the hope that something would happen.  The nurse arrived & explained that there were 2 arms & I had to put my other arm in.  I told her there was only one arm & explained my theory  

Then of course there was the time when an elderly lady walked in to my bay looking for the toilet.  She came out a few minutes later muttering that she didn't know if she had to take all of her clothes off or not.  I told her yes, everything off, even your knickers.  A nurse appeared after a while & knocked on the toilet door for the lady, she came out without her clothes.  The nurse said ''Edna why have you taken your clothes off you're only having your eye done?''.    

My pleasure,  I hope we can laugh at more funny stories, bring em on folks

Love Inanna xx

hahahaha Just reading your post then Rily very funny story :) big smiles here harry

This thread has cheered me up.When I was 18 I worked as a nursing auxiliary on an orthopaedic ward and here are some stories from that time.

We had a very elderly lady on the ward with a fracture that needed an operation.This cantankerous patient was as sharp as a tack with a penchant for walnut whips.I was standing near her bed when the consultant and the team arrived for the morning ward round.There was some discussion regarding the forthcoming surgery and the need for written consent.'Has that man got any walnut whips? came a quavery but determined voice,her beady eyes focused on the consultant.He turned round and asked if any of the team had any money.The favourite chocolate treat was purchased from the trolley by one of the junior medics.The old lady started munching away pausing to say 'now you are talking,where do I sign ?

One day I was helping a patient get washed when she said 'can you get that perfume out of the locker please nurse.My daughter brought it in for me,it's canal no 5.

There was a dr on the ward whose surname was Reckless.He went up to one of the patients to introduce himself.He actually said I'm Dr Reckless but the lady didn't hear the dr part and said to me 'if he's reckless he's not going anywhere near my leg'.

Lastly in 1986 I had to have a small operation.On the way down to the theatre I got talking to one of the nurses who wanted to buy some new nursing shoes later that day.I had bought some very comfy ones for myself and was about to recommend a couple of shops.I came round to find the same nurse telling me to wake up quickly.Apparently I had said 'you need to go to ....and the anaesthetic had taken affect and I was out like a light.Luckily I was able to wake up enough to give her the names of the shops before she went off duty.

Love to you all Jane XXX

Good stories Jane still smiling here harry x

Was that the endocrinologist at Bath?? He looked after me for a while and I used his book as a resource when teaching   

Hi Jenny,I can't remember his speciality.It was the RUH in Bath that I worked at that time 1978/9 so it probably was him.How is your husband getting on ? Love Jane XX