Anal Cancer

I totally understand what you are going through.  Sometimes being told that the tumour has gone doesn't bring the delight that one expects.  I think it is true to say that every single person whose lives have been affected personally by cancer has changed.  I am a little ahead of you (my last radiotherapy was 10 weeks ago) and it has been a struggle to get back to normal.  Little steps.  I only started last week by taking my dog for a walk again and although I found it tiring at the end my spirits were lifted by being back outdoors again.  Yesterday I went outside - I had to force myself - to do some gardening.  Although tired, I felt better after that too.  My appetite disappeared too, but my husband discovered that the domperidone I had been prescribed for nausea increased my appetite so although I had finished treatment, he gave me one before mealtimes.  My appetite is totally back to normal now.  Also, please don't discount going to your doctor for some help if your depression continues.  My lovely GP (who had cancer himself when much younger) was so sympathetic and prescribed me anti-depressants when I was first diagnosed last May.  I couldn't have managed without them, I used to pride myself on taking minimum medication, but they helped me through the enormity of the diagnosis.  Please come back and let us know how you get on. 

Hi there Doris13,

Firstly welcome to the Macmillan online community although obviously I’m really sorry that you’ve had the need to find us. Secondly congratulations on the news that your treatment has been successful. 

I’m really sorry that you’re feeling so low right now, as Irene75359 has said sometimes the news that you’re cancer free & the elation you expect to feel do not always go hand in hand. I think to a certain extent some of us go into autopilot whilst going through treatment etc., & then when that’s all over & done with & you’re not facing the routine of daily hospital appointments, although you look forward to this day, all of the emotions we’ve shelved during that time come crashing down all at once & we hit what can only be described as a depression. Your lack of appetite could possibly be connected with this too.

The fatigue caused by the toxicity of the treatment you’ve had has robbed you of the active life you had prior to diagnosis & you’ll surely be missing that but you can get back there, maybe it’ll be a gradual process & need to be taken in baby steps but it’s definitely possible. Getting out in the fresh air if only for a short walk with my dog or having a cuppa sitting in the garden always made me feel better in those early days, it really is sometimes just the simple things that begin to lift your spirits. 

Also remember it’s very early days for you yet, your body has been through a massive trauma both physically & mentally & people think of the healing process being just the physical but you need to heal from this emotionally too. Please don’t hesitate to contact your GP for some advice if you continue to feel this way, there are lots of options he/she will have to offer including medication & specific counselling services. I’m sure you’ll find once your mood begins to improve your appetite will also. Please remember in the short term also you can always contact the Macmillan Helpline if you feel talking to someone about the way you’re feeling would help. 

I hope this has helped a little, remember we’re always here to try & support you too. 

Nicola 

Hi Doris,  you are not alone here with this fab group of warriors , they all are such positive and helpful people who are going through the same sort of cancer....... I'm one of them too! 

I was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer September 15th 2021

Had my op within days, got fitted with a stoma bag during my op. They couldn't remove my tumour so

Had the same gold star treatment as you, including blood transfusion for anemia

The burns were not pleasant after radio and chemo but got through it with morphine

And my fabulous hubbie nursed me through everything........

Had scans etc, in Feb, and waited 8 weeks for results

and was told by a junior registrar that my cancer had gone and wasn't showing on my ct scan.

Of course ,I didn't believe him.. it didn't seem real at the time...... but have got another ct scan in 2 weeks and MRI scan the week after

Hopefully will get to see my regular oncologist for a result on both.

The highs and lows will keep creeping in but staying positive and talking about how you feel with friends and family will get you through it... it's good to keep busy with a pastime or a hobby to concentrate on

I'm 63, and feeling less energitic than I was

It's normal, so the doctors tell me... baby steps for now and all will start to  feel like progress ....

I have been reading this forum since I was directed to it by another member, not great at writing down my feelings, it's tough to put things into words

But it has been a huge help in reading everyone's support , advice and knowing we're not alone

Got to hand it you to everyone, they are all heros and fighters in my eyes

Plus we are all stronger than we think

Hello Doris, I've got exactly what you had and I'm about to start the Chemo/Radiotherapy on Monday in Bristol. I live miles away from Bristol and since they've taken away the hostel that they had for cancer patients, I'm going to have to stay in a hotel for the duration. I'm going to try and focus on things that I can do rather than what I can no longer do. When you think about it there are plenty of things that can be done sitting down such as reading, writing, crafts, crosswords, jigsaws etc. I'm very lucky, I have lots of lovely friends and a wonderful husband. Small steps is the answer, Doris, and maybe a slightly different lifestyle than you had before at least for a while. I wish you all the luck in the world. x

Hi Doris

I’m new on here and I understand what you are going through.  I’m almost 77 and was diagnosed with squamous cell cancer of the anus 5 years ago.  I had chemoradiation like you and for a while I was OK but unfortunately it came back and I had to have major surgery resulting in me having a colostomy.

 It’s been a long difficult journey made worse by being diagnosed with lung cancer and having part of my lung removed  in the middle of it but I am now feeling much better.

My advice to you is this.  Take baby steps, it’s early days for you, stay positive no matter what, accept that suddenly dissolving into tears is normal when you are recovering and the older you are the longer it takes.    Believe in yourself, your energy levels will gradually get better but accept that you may not get back to what you were.  My passion is gardening and I cannot do what I used to.  I cannot dig but I have found ways round that, I can kneel down and weed but I have to take frequent breaks.  So I do a bit then put my feet up for half an hour then get up and do some more.  If you have a project that you can concentrate on it helps with your state of mind be it sewing, knitting, gardening, or any hobby really.  Hopefully you are getting support from friends and family because it makes you feel you matter especially when you are feeling low.  I belong to a book circle and when I was physically not able to do much at all and feeling low I had to make myself read the allocated book to be able to join in the discussion on it  on Zoom so it gave me a purpose.  I firmly believe that trying to keep your mind occupied with something helps in physical recovery. I hope this forum helps you.