The barn door was closed after the horse had bolted.

Hello LCraig

oh dear we have all been there or nearly been there. I have such a routine now that I have learnt signs of when I can hang on or I have just got to go. Luckily it has not actually happened but early days I so wished we had a downstairs loo as some mornings during my coffee making session (before I actually drunk it) I would feel the urge and know I would literally try and fly up those stairs. Very good for pelvic floor training but a couple of times struggling to pull down those pyjamas was a nightmare. If I happen to be loose due to something eaten I would dread being out somewhere where I could not reach a toilet. I have been known to just run in the gents due to the ladies being busy. Today after three and a half years I know my body and know if it’s unlikely I will be needing it after the morning session. But if I am out all day visiting relatives or something I always take a little bag with wipes and spare knickers and wear period type knicker for added protection if the worst happened and there is always Imodium. Oh the trials of life after Anal Cancer!

I’m so sorry that this happened to you and understand how distressing it is.

 It can feel that the last of your dignity has gone and goodness knows this cancer and the treatment certainly removes a lot of personal privacy and pride.

 You are not alone- happened to me twice and was absolutely my biggest fear about returning to work.

You have a good strategy in place so are right not to become over obsessed with it. Never ignore an urge and always check out where the nearest loo is. The stage of treatment you are at is hard and can play havoc with everything but hopefully will settle post treatment.  My heart goes out to you though x

LCraig

I wore Tena incontinence pants for most of the time of my treatment and for some time afterwards.  I didn't need them (but I did once afterwards when I wasn't prepared).  Ok, they aren't the most comfortable thing to wear but I did feel a bit safer.

I am sorry this happened to you but your own guidelines are spot-on.  And just to see you through you might want to consider the Tenas...

And how right you are not to become obsessed by it.  You sound full of resolve, on today, your birthday!  I really hope that (in spite of the hiccup) you are having a lovely day.

Irene xx

Definitely re: trials of life (after) with Anal Cancer.

I really do think having a bag with extras and essentials is an excellent idea. Not something I thought I would ever need. But, better to be prepared rather than sorry.

I doubt this will happen again but then I naively thought it never would. I think having Anal Cancer is an education in how to over come shame.

Thank you PEB24 

i appreciate your empathy and your insight into this.

I am very confident that my mistake was not listening to my body and responding to it’s messages and warnings in a timely manner.

I will definitely heed the warnings in future especially when I am out about somewhere.

x

Thank you Irene75359 

I think getting Tenna is a very wise bit of advice. Having an accident at home is one thing having an accident out and about is another.

Everyone here has given me such wise advice based on experience. It helps me to normalise my experiences and feel better about myself.

xx

Please don’t ever feel ashamed. Show me a person who doesn’t POO! If I ever talk about my sometimes struggles, they open up about their IBS or something personal and it helps them be able to talk to someone who understands.

Julie