Anxiety about upcomming treatment

Hi Ian, 

I think suffering anxiety throughout this whole process is perfectly natural but if you’re prone to it anyway you must be feeling pretty stressed. 

Like you're doing now the closer I got to treatment the more I worried about the physical effects it would have on me. 

My story is a little different to most on here as I was diagnosed T1N0M0 & was lucky enough to be caught early enough to have my tumour completely removed surgically more or less as soon as it was detected, it wasn’t actually visible on either of my diagnostic scans! The histology report following surgery showed a a 4mm clear margin in all but a small area where there was only a 1mm clearance which is the exact cut off point for further treatment therefore I was referred to oncology & advised to have the chemo-radiotherapy! So say this came as a shock was an understatement & I began to panic as I’d read a the list of awful side effects of the treatment. I was entered into the Plato trial which consists of 4.5 weeks of treatment as opposed to the standard 5.5 with the radiotherapy being of a slightly lower strength.

Reading your other posts I think Andrews treatment is slightly different from the standard, it sounds as though he’s maybe having additional chemo alongside, most people have either their chemo administered via an infusion day 1 (mine literally took about 5 minutes to administer although waiting for the infusion to be made up was the time consuming part!) then chemo tablets twice a day each day of radiotherapy (weekends off) the odd one or two people on here have had their chemo as an inpatient weeks one & five of treatment but I think this depends on the hospital you’re treated at. Like you I worried about the nausea etc., but honestly I took the first lot of anti-sickness meds I was given then didn’t bother after that, my oncologist said it’s generally the infusion that can make you feel nauseous rather than the tablets. My hair went a little thinner, not that anyone else would notice, but apart from that I had no symptoms from the chemo at all. The radiotherapy side effects accumulate very slowly over the days & you’ll manage those with the support of your radiotherapy/oncology team, mine were excellent at giving me advice, creams etc., to help with my symptoms. 

In response to your question about the anxiety settling once treatment had begun yes mine definitely did, I was incredibly anxious beforehand but once it began I was of the mind that I’d jumped on this 4.5 week ride & there was no getting off! I have a couple of family members that suffer with anxiety & it really is no joke so I totally understand the whole fight or flight  response but as hard as it is at the moment try & focus past treatment & think about how many of us on here are through the other side of this treatment & disease free! I’m now 11 months post treatment & disease free at present. 

As well as the support you'll receive from the professionals involved in your treatment you’ll always find a listening ear here too, we have a wealth of experience amongst us & have no doubtably all felt similarly to how you’re feeling now. I’m also aware that different Cancer organisations offer counselling services, I have a Cancer Connections service close to me that you can access talking therapy etc., through which may help with your anxiety, or speak to the Macmillan advice line here as they may be able to point you in the direction of something similar, just a thought. 

I hope this has helped a little, please don’t be afraid to ask if there’s anything else you want to know.

Nicola 

Thank you Nicola, that does help. 

I tend to have good hours and bad hours rather than days. No doubt you will see me rambling about my current state of mind many more times over the next few months. Lol.

Thanks for your support

Ramble away Ian, that’s exactly what this forum is for & rest assured you’ll be rambling to people that totally understand lol

Nicola

Cheers Nicola x

Hi Ian

I too suffer terribly with anxiety after suffering a mental breakdown almost 20 years ago , I started treatment on Tuesday 7th May , I was petrified , not really about the cancer but more about the treatment , would I have a reaction , side effects Etc Etc mind working overtime all the time .

story so far 

5 day infusion as an in patient , painless , no bad side effects , nausea but never sick , controlled by meds 

now on day 12 of radiotherapy , again painless , I am having not sweats due to it inducing the menopause , but have met some great people , all in the same boat we sit together everyday laughing and spurring each other on ,nursing staff to speak to everyday who I have explained my anxiety to and are there to speak to and really reassure you .

I do think the anxiety of waiting for treatment to start was worse than the treatment so far , I no I have 15 days to go but I'm almost half way there , 1 day at a time .

Thanks for sharing @Saffwaff your experience so far will provide re-assurance to others about to start.

The treatment builds up in your system slowly, its all manageable. Your hospital will help you every step of the way, they won’t want you to suffer.

Sounds like you're in a good place, considering everything.

Keep talking, laughing and ticking off those days. It’ll be over before you know it.

Sarah x

Hi Lisa, thanks very much for replying.  

That does help me a lot tbh. It's nice to know how well things can go from another with the same issues with anxiety. 

In glad to hear things are going well for you.

I an looking forward to starting treatment now tbh. The sooner we start the sooner we finish.

Thanks again

That's true 

I'm half way now 1more week then 2nd infusion and then almost finished , it's surprising how quick it goes , 

The more I'm getting on the easier the anxiety is getting , and I'm sure you will feel the same , the fear of the unknown is a terrible thing ,

Is it Tuesday you start ?

If I don't speak before wishing you luck.

Hi Lisa, 

Weds 29th was the plan. Could get affected by the bank holiday though. I have never been put out by bank holidays  lol.

I will let you know how I am getting on.

Cheers Lisa x

Hi Lisa,

Hope you are still well, your another week closer to the end now too aren't you. 

Had my first chemo and radio today.

I made a new discussion on it in fact but wanted to get your thoughts. 

The radio was a breeze once I got used to the machine and how it worked. 

The chemo was by iv and i have tablets to take for the month. It left me feeling a bit wierd.  Not sick just "Wrong" with mild palpitations. 

I'm trying to distract myself and not over think it. It could be the steroids they gave me as anti sickness meds. Or perhaps that just how the chemo will affect me. 

Did you experience any thing like that?

Best wishes