I have two cancers anal and vaginal . I have completed the chemo radiation treatment about five weeks ago . Unfortunately I was admitted to hospital two weeks or so into the treatment with severe diarrhoea. I had neutropenic sepsis and was extremely poorly and the decision was made to stop the chemo but continue with the radiotherapy. I was in for over three weeks . I did finish the radiotherapy while I was an inpatient . A feeding tube was fitted in my neck but that caused another infection so it was taken out . I was in so much discomfort and pain but I managed to get through it all.
I came home and within days my partner told me he wanted to leave.He has been having chemo for stomach cancer this year and had his stomach removed a couple of weeks before I became so sick. He was having his second round of chemo during my stay in hospital and I knew he was struggling on his own but I couldn’t do much about it as I was so poorly myself .
He exhibited quite cruel behaviour to me when I got home , I certainly wasn’t well enough to deal with that on top of everything. So now I am on my own trying to recover from all the side effects of the treatment. The pain isn’t as bad as it was but I still have a lot of constant discomfort in my bowels and am so tired . It’s been such a rough time . I feel very sad because he wasn’t like this before he got cancer and I feel like is both having cancer just became too much for us to deal with .
I just want to be out of this and have my life back but I have to accept it’s just not possible.
Today I received a call saying I wasn’t going to have the brachytherapy which has been proposed since the vaginal cancer was diagnosed. I am so upset , I feel like that was my best chance of beating this and no one can tell me exactly why it isn’t going ahead as planned last week with my oncologist. I feel like I’m being given up on .
