Hi, I’m new to the online community and wanted to share what brought me here and look to anyone who can relate and offer any advice on the painful journey of waiting for the inevitable call from the hospital ward. A short two months ago my husbands behaviours started to change slightly, he’d been having a bit of pain in his shoulder and finally I persuaded him to go to the doctor. He had a myriad of tests, one was a CT scan which showed a ‘shadow’ on his lung. Given his change in behaviour and the result of the scan, the doctor advised it was probably an infection which was also causing delirium. After two weeks of antibiotics, his behaviour was becoming worse and I finally took him back where the doctor then referred him to hospital for a CT scan. That was only a mere 4 weeks ago, the day my world turned upside down forever. The scan showed a large tumour covering his left frontal lobe which had originated from a tumour on his lung and highly likely there were other tumours internally as it isn’t usual for the tumours to travel directly from the lung to the brain. They said they were very sorry and there wasnt anything they could do other than make him comfortable and gently told us that he had ‘weeks rather than months’ left. He was admitted into hospital that night and the tumour has grown at a fast rate, he is now unable to stand, focus or eat by himself. He doesn’t recognise me and I am trying to come to terms with how this happened so quickly with no symptoms to speak of, he didn’t have headaches or any substantial pain, just a niggle in his shoulder. Thank you
Hi Benjybutton and a very warm welcome to the Macmillan Community but I am so sorry to hear about your husband’s diagnosis.
Having been on my cancer journey for over 26 years with two very rare, hard to treat types of Non Hodgkin’s Lymphomas (one incurable), Asbestosis and recently Prostate Cancer that navigating this journey can be such a stressful and challenging time for families but talking with and getting support from people who have walked or are walking the ‘exact same' journey can help a lot.
The Community is actually divided into dedicated Support Groups (Discussion Rooms) and when it comes to the practical and emotional challenges of supporting your husband and indeed yourself you may benefit from joining and posting in our general cancer……
Supporting someone with incurable cancer
……. support groups where you will connect with a wide range of members navigating the exact same support challenges.
To connect with a group click on the “Bold Links” I have created above …… then once the group page opens click in the [Black - Click to Join - Banner] that appears at the bottom of the page and this will then confirm that you have joined the group.
When you are ready……. you can introduce yourself by putting up your very own post by clicking [+ Create new post] or [+] in the top right of the group page.
You can copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.
It is an emotional time supporting family so you might find this Macmillan information your feelings when someone has cancer helpful as well as this link getting help with your emotions.
As always the Macmillan Support Line is open between 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00…… this service provides cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits and financial guidance or just a listening ear.
Talking to people ‘face to face’ can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing.
Do get back to me if you need further help navigating the community.
