Hi there.
I hope everyone is well as can be. My name is Peter and I am a dad to 2 children, a boy 13 called Noah and a girl 10 called Fleur.
I wanted to speak primarily about my daughter. She is home educated by my mother in law for her final year of primary. My father in law has terminal cancer primarily liver and is predominantly bed bound.
My daughter takes part in some of the care of my father in law, taking him food and drinks in bed, no personal care involved.
I am concerned at the emotional impact this is having on her. She has stated that she is worried about walking in and finding him passed, or worried that it will be the last time she sees him.
I took a day off work just for me and her, to help her get some grounding. I am looking at getting her a wellbeing journal to try and help with her emotions as well as speaking to her more so that she doesn't bottle up things.
Does anyone have any suggestions that we could look at helping her through this difficult time?
Any and all suggestions are greatly appreciated.
Thanks for reading.
Peter
Hi PeterR26 and a very warm welcome to the Macmillan Community but I am so sorry to hear about your Father in Law and the challenges and stressful time the family is having.
I personally have no first hand experience to bring to the table but I can appreciate the difficulties especially as your daughter is involved in the situation significantly.
Getting support from others who are dealing with the ‘same' support challenges and circumstances can help you a lot…….
The Community is actually divided into dedicated Support Groups (Discussion Rooms) and when it comes to the practical and emotional challenges of supporting your father in law, your daughter, indeed the rest of the family you may benefit from joining and posting in our general cancer……
Supporting someone with incurable cancer
……. support groups where you will connect with a wide range of members navigating the exact same support challenges.
To connect with a group click on the “Bold Links” I have created above …… then once the group page opens click in the [Black - Click to Join - Banner] that appears at the bottom of the page and this will then confirm that you have joined the group.
When you are ready……. you can introduce yourself by putting up your very own post by clicking [+ Create new post] or [+] in the top right of the group page.
You can copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.
You may find some of these Macmillan resources helpful on understanding childrens' reactions and also talking to children when an adult has cancer.
As always the Macmillan Support Line is open between 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00…… this service provides practical information, emotional support, or just a listening ear.
Talking to people ‘face to face’ can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Support in your area…… definitely check to see if you have a Maggie's Centre in your area…… as these folks are amazing and give specific support for children.
Do get back to me if you need further help navigating the community.
