Just starting out in my cancer journey

Hi DerbyshireGirl im sorry you have found yourself here. My cancer was different to yours, but a cancer diagnosis in my opinion is a complete head f**k. There is no right or wrong as to how you should be feeling and everything you have said you feel is normal. Like you have said you find out who your friends are, i found some of the people i thought would step up didnt but also people i hadnt expected anything from did step up. As far as your work goes i wouldnt worry i think employers worry that they may be seen to be putting pressure on you if they contact you and worry about how they will look although i do understand that it makes you feel like they dont care. As to how to cope i personally tried to keep busy and went on autopilot and just dealt with each thing as it came. Once you have a treatment plan in place and get started it does make you feel more in control. Take things one day at a time, feel what you need to feel and take care of you. Sending hugs. Xx

Thank you . I feel a fraud having time off as I don’t , apart from feeling more tired than usual and having a bit of an achy arm, actually feel ill . I’m definitely keeping busy, just writing a list of things to batch cook for the freezer etc , and jobs that I need to do prior to starting treatment / having surgery . 
my hubby is fantastic but obviously he’s also been affected and his words were I do love you I just don’t know what to say. 
we haven’t children and only got my mum whose in her 80s so not really family support. 
I guess , like you say once I know exactly what I’m facing it’ll all become clearer and I will get through this . 
thank you again for your reply and good luck with your journey x

You are not a fraud, cancer is as much a mental thing as it is physical. Take whatever time you need from work, i was the same as you never had time off and said i would work through treatment but in the end i put me first and took the time off. Sounds like you have a good husband. Good luck with everything. Xx

Hi DerbyshireGirl 

I am sorry that you are facing a cancer diagnosis, and I hope it doesn’t have too much impact on your knee replacement plans.

This site is divided into a number of community groups and you might like to join the Breast cancer forum where you will be able to get support from peers who are going through or have experienced breast cancer. 

Thanks . Not v savvy with pcs and forums so will work out how to post 

Hi, I was diagnosed with triple negative breast cancer and started chemo mid march. So far I have had chemo with immunotherapy and then 1 top up, due next top up 2moz. I felt lot like you did/do, felt numb, like it wasn't happening then next minute I was like ok this is happening just get on with it then back to denial. I dont think there is a right or wrong way to feel, feel however you feel and be ok with all of it. Getting a diagnosis is shocking. Ive had times where ive cried and cried yet cant tell you what started it. Hoping this reply helps you feel better and know you aren't alone. Always here if need to vent or chat or need someone who knows what it's like. We will beat this xx