Hello,
my dad has been fighting cancer for 30 years!!
He has had any treatment offered and beat it so many times.
Yesterday he was told the operation in January 2025 was unsuccessful . He is 81!
Both of my parents are broken and in disbelief that nothing more can be done and his prognosis is 6-12 months.
He has shut down, won't eat, talk. My mum is overwhelmed with the news and seeing him like this.
Ironically I work for cancer research and now feel I'm torn between continuing to support such an important job and giving it all up to be with my dad.
How do I help both of my parents?
Do what you feel is right. Maybe taking some leave time at work will allow you to take care of him and keep him company. I believe they have benefits offered to those who are taking care of family members. Life is so hard at times. But you will get through this. 
️
Hi Laststar70 and a warm welcome to the Macmillan Community but so sorry to hear about your dad.
This is such a challenging and stressful time but getting support from others who are dealing with the ‘exact same' support challenges can help you a lot.
The Community is actually divided into dedicated Support Groups (Discussion Rooms) and when it comes to the practical and emotional challenges of supporting your dad, mum and indeed yourself you may benefit from joining and posting in our……
and
Supporting someone with incurable cancer
……. support groups where you will connect with a wide range of members navigating the exact same support challenges.
To connect with a group click on the “Bold Italic Links” I have created above …… then once the group page opens click in the [Black - Click to Join - Banner] that appears at the bottom of the page and this will then confirm that you have joined the group.
When you are ready……. you can introduce yourself by putting up your very own post by clicking [+ Create new post] or [+] in the top right of the group page.
You can copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.
It is an emotional time supporting family so you might find this Macmillan information your feelings when someone has cancer helpful as well as this link getting help with your emotions.
The Macmillan Support Line is open between 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00…… this service provides cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear.
Talking to people ‘face to face’ can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing.
Do get back to me if you need further help navigating the community ((hugs))
