Hi all,
Im very new here.
I came home from working nights at the start of March and my husband was on the floor having a seizure. My children found him. We were taken to ED for a CT just expecting that he’d had a TIA but they found a mass on his frontal lobe.
At the neuro appointment they said they suspected it was a low grade Glioma, growing slowly for years.
At the end of March he had surgery and they managed to remove 98% of it. We have just had the biopsy results back and have no found out it’s Stage 3 Oligodendroglioma. When his surgeon said this the world fell away from my feet and my head just span. My husband will be starting radiotherapy and chemo as soon as his brain has healed enough.
We’ve just had to break the news to our 5 children (14, 13, 12, 11 & 3). Trying to keep upbeat and positive but I want to scream and break things. We’re a blended family and we have been through the wringer in the past and thought things were settling down now and then this smacks us in the face.
im so scared and don’t want to voice those fears as my husband is really keeping positive and doesn’t want to know anything about it. I’m juggling working nights, 5 kids (4 are Neurodivergent), I’m also classed as disabled and my husband has always supported me with my struggles and then this and what’s to come I think my head may explode.
people have said “anything we can do let us know” but I’m terrible at asking for help and to be honest I need to know what sort of help they’re offering. My parents have been amazing but my husbands mum is very odd and she’s barely contacted him which I know he finds hurtful even though he claims he doesn’t care.
he’s just gone to a support session this evening and said it helped so I thought I would try here and see how it goes.
thanks for reading.
Hi Twd7 and a very warm welcome to the Macmillan Community but sorry to hear about your husband’s diagnosis.
A cancer diagnosis like this can be such a challenging and stressful time but getting support from others who are dealing with the ‘exact same' cancer type or support challenges will help you a lot……. I have a completely different type of cancer and treatment journey.
The Community is actually divided into dedicated Support Groups (Discussion Rooms) so can I recommend you look to join and post in our dedicated…….
……. support groups.
These groups are safe places to talk to others who may have a similar diagnosis, treatment experience, to ask questions and get support from family members who are navigating the same support journey.
As for the practical and emotional challenges of supporting your husband and indeed yourself you may benefit from joining and posting in our……
Supporting someone with incurable cancer
……. support groups where you will connect with a wide range of members navigating the exact same support challenges.
To connect with a group click on the “Bold Italic Links” I have created above …… then once the group page opens click in the [Black - Click to Join - Banner] that appears at the bottom of the page and this will then confirm that you have joined the group.
When you are ready……. you can introduce yourself by putting up your very own post by clicking [+ Create new post] or [+] in the top right of the group page.
You can copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.
It is an emotional time supporting family so you might find this Macmillan information your feelings when someone has cancer helpful as well as this link getting help with your emotions.
The Macmillan Support Line is open between 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00…… this service provides cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear.
We also have our Ask an Expert section but do allow 3 working days for a reply.
Talking to people ‘face to face’ can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing.
Do get back to me if you need further help navigating the community ((hugs))
