Mum has recently been diagnosed with Stage 3 Lung Cancer, I live and work in Manchester, she lives in my Hometown in Oxfordshire by herself. Mum is 77 and reasonably independent normally and I go visit every 4 to 6 weeks to help her with things she may struggle with. She has been told if she had surgery the lung would have to be removed and with her other health conditions she isn't going ahead with surgery because there is a high risk of Mortality with this during and after surgery. We've been advised that Chemotherapy would only offer a 10% improvement so she has declined this treatment having seen what both her parents and sister went through and sadly still passed away. It has been agreed that Radiotherapy is the best option for her at this stage, which may give her up to an additional 3 years if successful. Is there any kind of support out there to help her remain independent during and in the weeks afterwards for her Radiotherapy, I understand she could still have some side effects in the weeks after treatment finishes. I am the main Next of Kin (My sister is a single parent with 2 young children under 10 and lives in Lincolnshire) with no responsibilities other than my job in Manchester. Is it likely that I would have to quit my job here to look after her during and after radiotherapy also thinking further down the line sadly when the time comes the consultants say they cant do anything else to stop the Cancer taking over or would Mum have to support (maybe treatment Carers, is is Private or NHS Provided)? Has anyone been in a similar situation? what did you do? Did your Parent get any extra support or did you have to quit working to help them? If you had to quit your job and not getting an income how did you Manage is there any government support/benefits for these temporary caring situations? Any help and advice would be much appreciated Thanks.
Hi Kris2207 and a very warm welcome to the Macmillan Community but sorry to hear about your mum’s diagnosis.
A cancer diagnosis like this can be such a challenging and stressful time but getting support from others who are dealing with the ‘exact same' cancer type or support challenges will help you a lot……. I have a completely different type of cancer and treatment journey.
The Community is actually divided into dedicated Support Groups (Discussion Rooms) so can I recommend you look to join and post in our…….
……. support group.
This group is a safe place to talk to others who may have a similar diagnosis, treatment experience, to ask questions and get support from family members who are navigating the same support journey.
As for the practical and emotional challenges of supporting your mum and indeed yourself you may benefit from joining and posting in our……
Supporting someone with incurable cancer
……. support groups where you will connect with a wide range of members navigating the exact same support challenges.
To connect with a group click on the “Bold Italic Links” I have created above …… then once the group page opens click in the [Black - Click to Join - Banner] that appears at the bottom of the page and this will then confirm that you have joined the group.
When you are ready……. you can introduce yourself by putting up your very own post by clicking [+ Create new post] or [+] in the top right of the group page.
You can copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.
It is an emotional time supporting family so you might find this Macmillan information your feelings when someone has cancer helpful as well as this link getting help with your emotions.
The Macmillan Support Line is open between 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00…… this service provides cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear.
We also have our Ask an Expert section but do allow 3 working days for a reply.
Talking to people ‘face to face’ can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing.
Do get back to me if you need further help navigating the community.
