Hello,
I have never done this before, long story short... I lost my dad to bowel cancer 8 months after he walked me down the aisle in November 2019 ( we lost him in the july 2020) he had no symptoms but tummy ache and was diagnosed quickly with stage four cancer. This was incredibly hard, him and my mum bought my brother and I up and gave us the best life, he welcomed my brothers baby girl Brooke into the world in the march so did get to hold her for a few months. My husband and I along with my brother supported my mum emotionally for these dwelling months and when my dad passed we all pulled together. My husband and I and my mum bought a big lovely house together by the sea in august 2023 and have all supported each other. My brother now has another child who is 3 and they are the light of our world. He is due to get married in September which is a huge goal for my mum to be better by and sat by his side.
Six weeks ago my healthy, fit, supportive hard working mum took herself to the GP with signs of bloody stools, all blood tests and other tests perfect, however her stool test was abnormal which lead to a colonoscopy ( she has her own post on here called " my world turned upside down " under the name JESSAME of which she has had great support. ) This led to colonoscopy which found lower rectal cancer, followed by MRI and CT which luckily showed no spread. Mum two weeks ago yesterday underwent ELAPE surgery as her surgeon suggested this is the best surgery for this cancer and has the best rate of removal. she has a stoma bag for life and we was told the surgery went very well which was promising. Mum's recovery has been named remarkable on discharge notes which is good. She has had a better appetite, pottering around the house and also going on little small walks, this is all two weeks after major surgery which I see as incredible and promising!
However today we have hit a wall, mum has been sleeping a lot which is normal for this and she is weak, but she has been up and about and trying to be normal and manage her pain well. She is very emotional today as she is told tomorrow she will be told outcome of lab report from tumour and if necessary any further treatment needed. The surgeon she had is one of the best and we are hoping this is nearing the end of any other obstacles. I feel so sorry for my mum because she is so strong and determined but she gets so down and sorry for herself and I feel totally helpless and feel so sorry for her myself. It is so unfair she is going through this as well as losing my dad. Any words of encouragement and advice would be appreciated. I am being as strong as I can but days like today I feel like we are just in hell.
thanks all
jess
Hi Jess/Jess101 and a very warm welcome to the online community which I hope you'll find is both an informative and supportive place to be.
I’m very sorry to read that you lost your dad a few years ago and now your mum has been diagnosed with the same type of cancer.
The online community is divided into different support groups so I'm going to recommend that you join the bowel cancer group, as you'll then connect directly with others who have had a similar diagnosis to your mum.
To join, just click on the link I've created and, once you've joined, you can start a new post in the same way as you did here and join in with existing conversations by clicking on 'reply'.
It would be great if you could put something about your mum's diagnosis and treatment into your profile as it really helps others when replying to you and also when looking for someone on a similar pathway. It also means that you don't have to keep repeating yourself. To do this click on your username and then select 'Profile'. You can amend it at any time and if you're not sure what to write you can take a look at mine by clicking on my username.
"Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"
Hi Katie and a very warm welcome to you too.
As you haven't joined any groups yet, or completed your profile, I wondered what has brought you here? Are you looking for support for your own cancer diagnosis or are you supporting a loved one living with cancer?
Warm wishes
Anne
"Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"
