Family support groups?

Hi Danni2029 and a warm welcome to the Macmillan Community but so sorry to hear about your dad’s diagnosis.

A cancer diagnosis in the family can be such a challenging and stressful time but getting support from others who are dealing with the ‘exact same' cancer or cancer support challenges can help a lot.

This New to Community area is like our reception desk where we try to direct you to the best part of the Community for you to get support.

The Community is actually divided into dedicated Support Groups (Discussion Rooms)……… but you don’t say what type of cancer your dad has…….. but if you care to have a look through THIS LIST you will find all our dedicated cancer support groups listed…… it’s so important to get the right group as not all cancers react in the same way.

These groups are safe places to talk to others who may have a similar diagnosis, treatment experience, to ask questions and get support from family members who are navigating the same journey.

Have a look through the LIST above and once you find the support group for your dad’s cancer type....... click on the link and when the group page opens you will see a [Black - Click to Join - Banner] at the bottom of the page, click in this box and this will then confirm that you have joined the group.

When you are ready……. you can introduce yourself by putting up your very own post by clicking [+ Create new post] or [+] in the top right of the group page.

You can copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.

As for the practical and emotional challenges of supporting your dad and indeed yourself and the ready of the family you may benefit from joining and posting in our……..

Family and Friends

Carers only (if you are their caregiver)

Supporting someone with incurable cancer (if this is appropriate)

……support groups where you will connect with others navigating the same support challenges.

It is an emotional time supporting family so you might find this Macmillan information your feelings when someone has cancer helpful as well as this link getting help with your emotions.

The Macmillan Support Line is open between 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00…… this service provides cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear.

Talking to people ‘face to face’ can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing and support all the family.

Do get back to me if you need further help navigating the community.

Thank You for responding so quickly I really appreciate it. My dad has been told he has a tumour in his lung and there’s cancer in his chest. His been unwell for 4 months now and he has been to the hospital and drs and they just kept telling him that they don’t know why his feeling unwell and it’s vertigo and then discharged him and finally his locom dr at his gp finally put him on the 2 week pathway and he got a full body scan and the dr phoned on Friday to tell him that he has got cancer. But I feel so angry that he has had this for 3-4 months and just kept dismissing him and telling him it was nothing. And I know that the earlier they detect it the better and it’s been growing and this could have severe consequences for him. He has a pet scan booked in next week then they can tell us what stage it is and if it can be treated or not. But I can’t sleep because it’s all going round in my head I feel drained and I’m just his son. I can’t imagine how he must feel to know he has cancer and how scared he must be. I just don’t know what to do I feel lost and useless and I can’t do anything to take this away from him. If I could I would rather it be Me who had this then him. I’m younger and stronger. I just don’t know what to do.  

sorry what I’m looking for is a online family support group to help Me. 

but I kinda feel like a imposter being on here because I’m not the one with cancer.

i just don’t know what to think.

sorry if I have unloaded all this on You. 

Reg Danni 

Hi again Danni2029 the community is a safe place to unload so well done.

I don’t totally understand what it is to be family looking on as someone goes through cancer…… although my wife and family have been by my side on my incurable cancer journey for over 25 years now…… 

The community is for everyone affected by cancer be it patients, family and friends……. so you are certainly not an imposter.

As you will see from my initial reply there are groups that cover the practical side of living and being treated for cancer but also an opportunity to connect in with people supporting family and friends.

So do look to join our dedicated Lung Cancer Support Group.

You should also join our Family and Friends group as well.

These groups will help you navigate the weeks and months going forward.

Thank You for you’re help And I’m very sorry to hear about you’re diagnosis it’s such a terrible thing to deal with I can’t imagine 

It’s all about prospective……. It’s a long story but my story is rather complicated (See my story) but I was diagnosed way back in 1999 at 43 with a rare (8 in a million) incurable but treatable type of Cutaneous T-Cell NHL (a type of slow growing Low-grade non-Hodgkin lymphoma) ……. eventually reaching Stage 4a in late 2013 when a second, also rare (4 in a million) type of aggressive Peripheral T-Cell - Not Otherwise Specified NHL (a type of fast growing High-grade non-Hodgkin lymphoma) was then presenting……. but I am coming up to 9 years out from my last treatment and turn 69 in Nov and I doing great…… I am actually living as a good a life as any fit 69 year old can live.

Hi Reg

Difficult time for you and your Dad, there's a lot to take in at the start of the cancer road, the main thing is to try and stay positive, lots of bumps on the way , some depression and anger is normal for both the patients and family/carers, once the treatment plan is in place you will be better prepared for the road ahead. getting a decent night's sleep is essential, as is keeping Google to a minimum....it only adds to worries already there.

My last cancer was misdiagnosed for nearly 2 years, I felt let down by medics, again this is normal, my anger soon passed.

You are certainly not an imposter, cancer affects not only the cancer patient but all of those close to him/her, tough road ahead for all.

Take care and best of luck

Peter