Mum's diagnosis

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Hello,

I'm totally new to this forum and hoping for some extra support to process what we've recently learned.

9 weeks ago my beloved step father died from terminal cancer (liver & lung) he was given 4-6 months but it was so aggressive he passed just 3 weeks later.

It was all very traumatic and still very raw. Just 8 weeks after he passed my mother attended a breast clinic due to changes in her breast. After a biopsy & a scan we had the devastating news this week that she has breast cancer which has spread to her bones & has secondary breast cancer of the bone.

She's in her late 70s & in otherwise good health so this along with our recent loss & being my mother has been hugely upsetting & difficult to come to terms with.

We're awaiting an oncologist referral to talk about treatment options & should get an appointment in the next week.

They've confirmed that it's incurable & advanced, all they can do is offer treatments to help alleviate symptoms & hopefully slowdown/stop progression. Surgery isn't an option as it's spread to the bones.

It's beyond devastating & I'm very close to my mother & still reeling from the trauma & grief of my step fathers passing.

I've started counselling through work & just reaching out to anyone that can offer any support/reassurance with this situation or if you've been in this situation yourself.

I'm not sure what lays ahead, it feels impossible to look to far ahead & we won't know much more until we speak to oncology ... It's just deeply heartbreaking Pensive 

Thank you x

  • Hi  and a very warm welcome to the online community which I hope you'll find is both an informative and supportive place to be.

    It's natural to feel heartbroken on discovering that your mother has secondary breast cancer, especially as you've only recently lost your step-father.

    As the online community is divided into different support forums I'm going to recommend that you join the secondary breast cancer forum which is a great place to ask questions and share experiences with others who have a similar diagnosis to your mother.

    To join, just click on the link I've created and, once you've joined, you can start a new post in the same way as you did here and join in with existing conversations by clicking on 'reply'.

    It would be great if you could put something about your mother's diagnosis into your profile as it really helps others when replying to you and also when looking for someone on a similar pathway. It also means that you don't have to keep repeating yourself. To do this click on your username and then select 'Profile'. You can amend it at any time and if you're not sure what to write you can take a look at mine by clicking on my username.

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     "Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"

  • Thank you so much, this is really helpful