Breast Cancer Diagnosis/mastectomy & reconstruction in 21 days

Hi Samantha321  and a very warm welcome to the Community but sorry to hear about your diagnoses.

Navigating the cancer journey can be such a stressful and challenging time but getting support from people who have walked the ‘exact same' cancer journey can help a lot. (I have a completely different cancer).

This New to Community area is like our reception desk where we look to try and direct you to the best part of the Community for you to get support. The Community is actually divided into dedicated Cancer Support Groups (Discussion Rooms) so can I recommend you join and post in our dedicated Breast Cancer support group. This will be a safe place to talk to others with a similar diagnosis, treatment experience, to ask questions and get support.

To connect in with the group please click on the link below

        Breast cancer

…… then once the group page opens click in the [Black - Click to Join - Banner] that appears at the bottom of the page and this will then confirm that you have joined the group.

When you are ready……. you can introduce yourself by putting up your very own post by clicking [+ Create new post] or [ + ] in the top right of the group page.

You can copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.

You may find it helpful to call the Macmillan Support Line open 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00. This service provides cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear. We also have our Ask an Expert section but do allow 3 working days for a reply.

Talking to people face to face can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing and give support to all the family.

Do get back to me if you need further help navigating the community.

Hi Samantha321,

I totally understand and yes it is normal. I went through it 5yrs ago and a single mum too, and now awaiting results as a possible chance I now have it in the other breast. What reconstruction are you having? I’ll be honest and say you will eventually have to let your guard down and allow your loved ones to help you. Don’t think I cried a single tear till the night after my operation as I was on auto pilot and had the mind set of right yep I’ve got cancer, let’s get the ops done and then I can carry on being mummy. We all deal with things differently and in these circumstances there is no right/wrong way, it’s just whatever works best for you and your family unit. Xx

Thank you for your response Willowwoo. I can completely relate to what you’ve said because that’s how I’m feeling! I really want a bilateral mastectomy for the exact reason you’ve mentioned - that I don’t have to go through all this again in however many years!! I’m having an implant in the breast they are removing. I don’t have the time or energy for the tummy op thing and as of recently a smoker so they won’t do it anyway. I haven’t even told my youngest daughter yet (12) as her mental health is fragile and she catastrophises everything so I’ll tell her at the end of next week that I’m having an operation. It’s hard to know what’s for the best but I’m just doing the best I can. As the operation date gets closer I am getting more and more anxious and if I’m honest scared and not much scares me as I truly am a student from the school of hard knocks. Anyway - thanks again for your response and I hope your results are favourable xx

Hey, I asked for a bilateral mastectomy at the time but was refused (tbh kinda sticking my fingers up at them now with my current situation and saying “and this is why” - grr!) I am a vaper but had to go on to 0% nicotine for them to go ahead with the diep. If I could relive that option then I would have gone with the implant as recovery time a lot less so think you will be fine in that sense. As for telling your daughter, only you can decide what is best. My house started to look like a funeral parlour full of flowers within weeks of diagnosis and obviously more loved ones were visiting and my daughter, who was 5at the time, picked up on all the hush hush chats so I just briefly told her that I had some silly naughty cancer cells so need to chop mummy’s boob off to make sure all gone. I then spoke to her school who helped massively too. Just try and simplify as best as you can and make it sound a quick fix. Tbh they are more resiliant than what we are at that age and I’m sure she will surprise you with little helping hands.

And of course your going to be scared, I’d be more worried if you wasn’t. It’s all very daunting and everything happens so quick after diagnosis, your brain doesn’t have time to fully take it all in. I was from the school of hard knocks too (I’m 44), but think this would even unbalance the likes of Fury and Joshua (boxers) let alone us ha ha. Being worried/scared is natural and don’t beat yourself up about feeling that way. Make sure you have someone you can use for a sounding board or come on here for a rant, just don’t hold your feelings back else you will make yourself poorly even more so.

Big hugs to you and stay positive. Let me know how things go if you can. 

Claire x 

Aaahh thanks Claire!! I’m going to be well pussed off if I’m another year I have to go through this all again but then I’ll insist on a nice new pair of bigger boobs (coz mine are small).

I will let you know how I get on.

lots of love 

Sam x