Hello, I’m new.
My husband has been diagnosed with cancer this week. Inside, I’m terrified but am being strong for him. I have to be. I’m trying to be positive. Trying to keep things as normal as possible although I find I can’t eat much and sleeping is hard. He’s the one who’s got cancer, he must be utterly terrified himself. He’s waiting on results of biopsies taken then will need to have staging CT and MRI scans. It’s this waiting that is so hard, the not knowing. He doesn’t want anyone in our family to know, including our adult children and, while I know this is probably best right now, until we know more, it’s incredibly hard. He didn’t even tell me he was going to hospital for a scope as he didn’t want to worry me. That’s why I’m hoping that coming on here will help, just talking to others.
Is anyone else in this situation, with a partner not wanting to tell anyone? How do you manage to support them but also yourself too?
Thanks
Hi roses26 and a warm welcome to the Online Community but so sorry to hear about your husband’s diagnosis.
A cancer diagnosis in the family can be such a challenging and stressful time but getting support from others who are dealing with the ‘exact same' cancer or cancer support challenges can help a lot.
This New to Community area is like our reception desk where we try to direct you to the best part of the Community for you to get support.
The Community is actually divided into dedicated Support Groups (Discussion Rooms)……… but you don’t say what type of cancer your husband has but if you care to have a look through THIS LIST you will find all our dedicated cancer support groups listed…… it’s so important to get the right group as not all cancers react in the same way.
These groups are safe places to talk to others who may have a similar diagnosis, treatment experience, to ask questions and get support from family members who are navigating the same journey.
Have a look through the LIST above and once you find the support group for your husbands cancer type....... click on the link and when the group page opens you will see a [ Black - Click to Join - Banner ] at the bottom of the page, click in this box and this will then confirm that you have joined the group.
When you are ready……. you can introduce yourself by putting up your very own post by clicking [ + Create new post] or [ + ] in the top right of the group page.
You can copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.
As for the practical and emotional challenges of supporting your husband you may benefit from joining and posting in our
support group where you will connect with others navigating the same support challenges.
You may find it helpful to call the Macmillan Support Line open 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00. This service provides cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear.
We also have our Ask an Expert section but do allow 3 working days for a reply.
Talking to people face to face can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing.
Do get back to me if you need further help navigating the community ((hugs))
Hi roses26 …… do connect in with our….
Bowel (colon and rectum) cancer
…… support group as you will get great support.
