My wife had a Radical Cystectomy with 53 lymph nodes removed as well. We are 9wks post surgery almost 10 however the pain in her groin on the right side is almost unbareable. She's not able to walk much of a distance. Even when she's sat down it's still painful. Pain relief isn't helping. Please has anyone experienced this or know someone that's experienced this and can tell me if this is normal? Does it get better? Right now it feels like the surgery has caused a whole load of problems with discharge, pain and bowels not working correctly. I feel so helpless.
Hi Crazycatlady37 and a very warm welcome to the Macmillan Community but sorry to hear about your wife’s diagnosis.
A cancer diagnosis in the family can be such a challenging and stressful time but getting support from others who are dealing with the ‘exact same' cancer type or support challenges will help you a lot……. I have a completely different type of cancer and treatment journey.
The New to Community is like our reception desk where we try to direct you to the best part of the Community for you to get support. The Community is actually divided into dedicated Support Groups (Discussion Rooms) so can I recommend you join and post in our dedicated……
…… support group. This group is a safe places to talk to others who may have a similar diagnosis, treatment experience, to ask questions and get support from family members who are navigating the same support journey.
As for the practical and emotional challenges of supporting your wife and indeed yourself you may benefit from joining and posting in our……
……. support group where you will connect with a wide range of members navigating the exact same support challenges.
To connect with a group click on the “Bold Italic Links” I have created above …… then once the group page opens click in the [ Black - Click to Join - Banner ] that appears at the bottom of the page and this will then confirm that you have joined the group.
When you are ready……. you can introduce yourself by putting up your very own post by clicking [ + Create new post] or [ + ] in the top right of the group page.
You can copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.
It is an emotional time supporting family so you might find this Macmillan information your feelings when someone has cancer helpful as well as this link getting help with your emotions.
You may find it helpful to call the Macmillan Support Line open 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00. This service provides cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear.
We also have our Ask an Expert section but do allow 3 working days for a reply.
Talking to people face to face can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing and support all the family.
Do get back to me if you need further help navigating the community.
I'm sorry to read how much pain your wife is in and it must be very distressing for you both.
I wondered if you meant to post this in the bladder cancer forum, where I can see you've posted before? I'm sure you'll find plenty of people there who will be happy to share their experiences with you.
"Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"
