Hi All,
I’m new here. My partner was diagnosed almost 4 weeks ago with cancer that started at the base of the tongue, secondary tumour on jaw and also nodules in his lungs. This was after months of feeling unwell, then in October he became hoarse and a few weeks later the lump on his neck was clearly visible and is pushing on his vocal cords so his speech it effected. They have said surgery isn’t an option but we haven’t exactly had a full prognosis as conversations with the oncologist so far revolve around pain management for headaches and chemo has been delayed by 2 weeks so he can see oral & maxillofacial surgery. They have said treatment is palliative not curative which is scary as the word palliative to me means end of life so questioning if treatment and the ill effects of it is even going to be worth it. I believe he is having carboplatin and 5FU in a pump for 4 days later, every 3 weeks for 18 weeks. He’s already underweight and not eating much so we are both terrified. Any advice would be much appreciated. Thanks
Hi Elaine101 and a very warm welcome to the online community which I hope you'll find is both an informative and supportive place to be.
I'm sorry to read that your partner has recently been diagnosed with cancer and it's natural for you to be feeling as you do.
As you know, the online community is divided into different support forums and I can see that you've already joined the head and neck cancer forum which is a great place to ask questions and share experiences with others who have a similar diagnosis to your partner. You might also like to consider joining the supporting someone with incurable cancer forum as you'll then connect directly with others who are supporting people with an incurable diagnosis.
To join, just click on the link I've created and, once you've joined, you can start a new post in the same way as you did here and join in with existing conversations by clicking on 'reply'.
It would be great if you could put something about your partner's diagnosis and proposed treatment into your profile as it really helps others when replying to you and also when looking for someone on a similar pathway. It also means that you don't have to keep repeating yourself. To do this click on your username and then select 'Profile'. You can amend it at any time and if you're not sure what to write you can take a look at mine by clicking on my username.
"Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"
