Don’t know what to do!

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My dad has Asbestos Mesothelioma and was diagnosed about 5 months ago. 2 months ago they aid he has till sept left, now they have told him day by day as it could happen anytime. We are not receiving any home help, and he is becoming very hate full a lot of the time to the few he has helping at home. He is also saying things that haven’t been said or really forget full. Tonight he has been telling us we are not letting him go to the toilet when he wants and things like that. Hopefully when my sister goes with my dad on Monday too the hospice on Monday help will be put in place as after next week I’m on my own to care. I work and also go to college

  • Hi  and a very warm welcome to the Macmillan Community but sorry to hear about your dad’s diagnosis and all the challenges you are dealing with.

    A cancer diagnosis in the family can be such a challenging and stressful time but getting support from others who are dealing with the ‘exact same' cancer type and support challenges will help a lot (I have a totally different type of cancer although I do have asbestosis as well)

    The New to Community is like our reception desk where we look to direct you to the best part of the Community for you to get support. The Community is divided into dedicated Cancer Support Groups (Discussion Rooms) so can I recommend you join and post in our dedicated Mesothelioma support group. This is a safe place to talk to others who may have a similar diagnosis, treatment experience, to ask questions and get support from family members who are navigating the same support journey.

    As for the practical and emotional challenges of supporting your dad you may benefit from joining and posting in our Carers only and Supporting someone with incurable cancer support groups where you will connect with others navigating the exact same support challenges.

    To connect with a group click on the “Bold Italic Links” I have created above then once the group page opens click on “Click to Join” when the black banner appears or “Join” under “Group Tools” (this all depends on the device you are using)

    You can then put up your own post when you’re ready by clicking “+new” or “+” in the top right next to the group title. You can copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.

    It is an emotional time supporting family so you might find this Macmillan information your feelings when someone has cancer helpful as well as this link getting help with your emotions.

    It’s a challenging time for you so you may want to use the Macmillan Support Line is open 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00. This service provides cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear.

    We also have our Ask an Expert section but do allow a few working days for a reply.

    Talking to people face to face can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing and support all the family.

    Do get back to me if you need further help navigating the community.

    Mike (Thehighlander)

    It always seems impossible until its done - Nelson Mandela

    Community Champion Badge

  • Thank you and I will do some of what you have recommended