Hello, this is a long story but I'll try to keep it brief. Just under a year ago my partner got diagnosed with testicular cancer. He had the op which didn't phase him as this was a minor op compared to his bowel ops for ulcerative colitis. We had a CT which showed enlarged lymph nodes and lung nodules and were told the cancer has spread. Had 3 cycles of BEP chemo. He had neutropenic sepsis with each cycle and on the last cycle his heart went into SVT and had to be chemically cardio-verted twice. His post-chemo scan showed a shrinkage to all areas. However, a few days ago he had a seizure out of the blue and MRI showed 2 brain tumours they suspect are a spread of the testicular cancer. We do not know how long they have been there as never had a head scan previously and the areas treated by chemo are still stable. The only new finding is a fracture to his spine so awaiting MRI result to check for mets or if his bones are fragile due to colitis treatments. We are awaiting treatment discussions. However, my partner is numb to all this and has given up. He feels like even if he beats this something else will show up. This is due to his years of battling colitis prior to this and is still an ongoing issue. He also feels like he cannot take anymore chemo after his last experience and any treatment he has is for my benefit and he doesn't care anymore. How can I support him and help him gain a more positive outlook?
Hi HLD90 and welcome to the Macmillan Community but so sorry to hear about your partners journey abd the challenges you are dealing with.
A cancer diagnosis like this in the family can be such a challenging and stressful time but getting support from others who are dealing with the ‘exact same' support challenges can help a lot.
The New to Community is like our reception desk where we look to direct you to the best part of the Community for you to get support. The Community is divided into dedicated Support Groups (Discussion Rooms) and when it comes to the practical and emotional challenges of supporting your partner and yourself you may benefit from joining and posting in our Carers only support group where you will connect with others navigating the exact same support challenges.
To connect with a group click on this link > Carers only then once the group page opens click on “Click to Join” when the black banner appears or “Join” under “Group Tools” (this all depends on the device you are using)
You can then put up your own post when you’re ready by clicking “+new” or “+” in the top right next to the group title. You can copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.
Talking to people face to face can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing and support all the family.
Please do get back to me if you need further help navigating the community.
