Partner diagnosed with bowel cancer

Hi Marella2023 and a very warm welcome to the Macmillan Community but sorry to hear about your partners diagnosis. 

A cancer diagnosis in the family can be such a challenging and stressful time but getting support from others who are dealing with the ‘exact same' cancer type and support challenges will help a lot (I have a totally different type of cancer)

The New to Community is like our reception desk where we look to direct you to the best part of the Community for you to get support. The Community is divided into dedicated Cancer Support Groups (Discussion Rooms) so can I recommend you join and post in our dedicated:

Bowel (colon and rectum) cancer 

and

Liver, secondary cancer

support groups. These groups are safe places to talk to others who may have a similar diagnosis, treatment experience, to ask questions and get support from family members who are navigating the same support journey.

As for the practical and emotional challenges of supporting your partner you may benefit from joining and posting in our:

Carers only 

and 

Supporting someone with incurable cancer

support groups where you will connect with others navigating the exact same support challenges.

To connect with a group click on the “Bold Italic Links” I have created above then once the group page opens click on “Click to Join” when the black banner appears or “Join” under “Group Tools” (this all depends on the device you are using)

You can then put up your own post when you’re ready by clicking “+new” or “+” in the top right next to the group title. You can copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.

It is an emotional time supporting family so you might find this Macmillan information your feelings when someone has cancer helpful as well as this link getting help with your emotions.

It’s a challenging time for you so you may want to use the Macmillan Support Line is open 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00. This service provides cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear.

We also have our Ask an Expert section but do allow a few working days for a reply.

Talking to people face to face can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing and support all the family.

Do get back to me if you need further help navigating the community.

Hi, my husband is in the same boat.  He was diagnosed at the end of 2021.  Just bowel cancer to start then given the all clear after a resection and one round of chemo, only to be told six months after that it had spread to his lungs and abdomen (now inoperable).   I am like you, I wanted to know everything, timelines etc, however he likes to bury his head so I am unable to ask when we go to see his consultant.  it is kinda like your life has been put on hold.  its hard to think ahead, but it does get easier, its been over 2 years for us now and he did well on the chemo (not really sick or anything), even though he is now on what they call second line therapy, which is targeted therapy and he now has trouble sleeping and seems to have hot flushes (I joke with him, saying he is going through the menopause! as I have gone through that, I understand how frustrating of poor sleep can be).  I am generally a really strong person, but at times being strong and positive is not easy because the future is going to be so different to what we had planned.  What I would say if you want to get married, do it!  it will give you both something to concentrate on.  Maybe it won't be as big as you wanted it to be, or bigger than you wanted, either way it will be great. 

Hi Hedgie abd a warm welcome to you as well.

Do have a look through the information I put up for Marella2023 as there is lots of support routes available.