Hi all,
I‘ve only just joined this forum and I just don’t know where to begin. So I thought I’d write down what I’m experiencing with the hope that someone might reach out and help.
On Xmas eve I noticed my mother (aged 60) started to stammer. She’d been complaining about numbness in her hand for a little while, yet she thought this would just be carpal tunnel from all her knitting. When she started to stammer and complained of numbness in the left side of her body, I called 999 thinking it was a stroke.
after initial tests, we had it confirmed it wasn’t a stroke and there had been bleeding in the brain. Mums had a CT scan and the specialists are certain it’s the return of her melanoma, which she had removed in 2021.
We’re waiting on an MRI to confirm the severity of the issue but they’re certain spores of the melanoma have travelled to her brain and lung.
I‘m 29, still finding my feet in life and very scared of what’s to come. My mother is my absolute rock and although we haven’t had a diagnosis yet, I can’t help but fear the worst. I have a strong family and friend network which I’m grateful for, but I don’t know how to voice this/where to turn to in this in-limbo phase whilst we wait for results.
are there any groups out there that support young adults going through this stuff? How do I support her/my father and manage my own aspirations? Is there anyone/any support groups I can turn to who understands my situation? How do I manage my emotions whilst we wait for a diagnosis? Any help would be so appreciated.
Love, light and festive wishes to you all experiencing hardships x
Hi TheGratefulGinger and a very warm welcome to the Macmillan Community but sorry to hear about your mum ‘s diagnosis and the challenges you are dealing with.
An ongoing cancer journey in the family like this can be such a challenging and stressful time but getting support from others who are dealing with the ‘exact same' cancer type and support challenges will help a lot (I have a totally different type of cancer)
The New to Community is like our reception desk where we look to direct you to the best part of the Community for you to get support. The Community is divided into dedicated Support Groups (Discussion Rooms) so can I recommend you join and post in our dedicated
support groups. These groups are safe places to talk to others who may have a similar diagnosis, treatment experience, to ask questions and more importantly to get support from family members who are navigating the same support journey.
As for the practical and emotional challenges of supporting your mum you may benefit from joining and posting in our Carers only support group where you will connect with others navigating the exact same support challenges.
To connect with a group click on the “Bold Italic Links” I have created above then once the group page opens click on “Click to Join” when the black banner appears or “Join” under “Group Tools” (this all depends on the device you are using)
You can then put up your own post when you’re ready by clicking “+new” or “+” in the top right next to the group title. You can copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.
It is an emotional time supporting family so you might find this Macmillan information your feelings when someone has cancer helpful as well as this link getting help with your emotions.
It’s a challenging time for you so you may want to use the Macmillan Support Line is open 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00. This service provides cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear.
We also have our Ask an Expert section but do allow a few working days for a reply.
Talking to people face to face can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support groups in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing and support all the family.
Do get back to me if you need further help navigating the community.
Hi Casey TheGratefulGinger I think that we all have to face up to the cancer mountain and commit to navigate it as best as we can and look for the small positives in the hope that these flourish…. Our family mindset has always been there is always hope until hope runs out….. let’s all hang onto hope ((hugs))
