My mother in law was diagnosed with liver (not sure where else as she didn't want any investigation work) cancer, she has recently been fitted with a driver.
I need to vent as my brother in law is useless. I mean I understand it's hard to help look after his mother so I do most of the care work myself, my partner helps where he can even helping me change her, but all I ask of my brother in law is simple things like make sure she has clean and dry nighties. The nurses came out a little while ago as the driver was beeping and I asked if they could give me a hand to change her, in all fairness they done it all as always without a moan, but my brother in law had washed the nighties 2 days ago and they were sat wet in a basket. It's not hard to make sure that she has clean dry nighties or bedding is it?
Can I ask how others cope? It looks like we will have to move in as well now as I just don't think he is looking after her during the night, I leave about 10/11 and I'm back by 6/7 he says he has it all in hand but I don't think he does.
Sorry to rant on my first post. Thank you for reading
Hi SA85 and welcome to the Macmillan Community but so sorry to hear about your mother in laws diagnosis and the challenges you are dealing with.
A cancer diagnosis like this in the family can be such a challenging and stressful time. I have cancer so I am on the other side of the fence but getting support from others who are dealing with the ‘exact same' support challenges can help a lot.
The New to Community is like our reception desk where we look to direct you to the best part of the Community for you to get support. The Community is divided into dedicated Support Groups (Discussion Rooms) and when it comes to the practical and emotional challenges of supporting your mother in law you may benefit from joining and posting in our Carers only and Supporting someone with incurable cancer support groups where you will connect with others navigating the exact same support challenges.
To connect with a group click on the “Bold Italic Links” I have created above then once the group page opens click on “Click to Join” when the black banner appears or “Join” under “Group Tools” (this all depends on the device you are using)
You can then put up your own post when you’re ready by clicking “+new” or “+” in the top right next to the group title. You can copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.
It’s a challenging time for you so you may want to use the Macmillan Support Line is open 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00. This service provides cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear.
We also have our Ask an Expert section but do allow a few working days for a reply.
Do get back to me if you need further help navigating the community
