Hi I am looking for some honest information. My partner was diagnosed with bladder cancer 12 months ago. This has now spread to the liver, lungs and spine. Fast forward to this week. He went to have his first dose of immunotherapy and the consultant came and informed us that the cancer is spreading quite fast. He said it takes a couple of months for immunotherapy to show any response, and as we don’t have this time, does he still want to go ahead with the treatment. of he did and he has his second dose at the end of December. Does this mean that we are wasting our time. Will he even be here in 2 months. I need to know but no one is saying because initially my partner did not want to know these details, but that leaves me struggling to get my head around things.
Hi JillyBean and welcome to the Online Community but so sorry to hear about your partners diagnosis. A cancer diagnosis like this in the family can be such a challenging and stressful time but getting support from others who are dealing with the ‘exact same' cancer type and support challenges can help a lot.
The New to Community is like our reception desk where we look to direct you to the best part of the Community for you to get support. The Community is divided into dedicated Cancer Support Groups (Discussion Rooms) if you care to have a look through THIS LIST you will find all our many dedicated cancer support groups listed.
These groups are safe places to talk to others who may have a similar diagnosis, treatment experience, to ask questions and get support from family members who are navigating the same journey.
Have a look through the LIST above and once you find the groups for your partners cancer type you can join the group by selecting “Click to Join” when the black banner appears or “Join” under “Group Tools” (this all depends on the device you are using)
You can then put up your own post when you’re ready by clicking “+new” or “+” in the top right next to the group title. You can copy and paste the text from this post into your new post. You can also scroll through other members posts and click “Reply” to get involved.
As for the practical and emotional challenges of supporting your partner you may benefit from joining and posting in our Carers only and Supporting someone with incurable cancer support groups where you will connect with others navigating the same support challenges.
It is an emotional time supporting family so you might find this Macmillan information your feelings when someone has cancer helpful as well as this link getting help with your emotions.
The Macmillan Support Line is open 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00. This service provides cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear.
We also have our Ask an Expert section but do allow a few working days for a reply.
Talking to people face to face can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing.
Do get back to me if you need further help navigating the community.
