New and just reaching out

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My dad was diagnosed with kidney cancer and probably adrenal gland too, he was diagnosed 20 days ago and things are moving so fast, pre op the next day, full body Ct scan (no results from that) and now he is having his kidney removed a week today, I suffer myself with health anxiety and my biggest fear in cancer, this has made me so scared and my mental is so ban around this, is it normal for everything to go so quickly as I fear it’s because it’s so bad maybe?

thank you

  • Hi  and a very warm welcome to the Macmillan Community but sorry to hear about your dad's diagnosis. It's reassuring that this is moving quickly as the faster this is done the better the results can be.

    A cancer diagnosis in the family can be such a challenging and stressful time but getting support from others who are dealing with the ‘exact same' cancer type and support challenges will help a lot (I have a totally different type of cancer)

    The Community is actually divided into dedicated Cancer Specific Support Groups (Discussion Rooms) so can I recommend you join and post in our Kidney cancer support group. This is a safe place to talk to others who may have a similar diagnosis, treatment experience, to ask questions and get support from family members who are navigating the same support journey.

    As for the practical and emotional challenges of supporting your dad you may benefit from joining and posting in our Family and Friends support group where you will connect with others navigating the exact same support challenges.

    To connect with a group click on the “Bold Italic Links” I have created above then once the group page opens click on “Click to Join” when the black banner appears or “Join” under “Group Tools” (this all depends on the device you are using)

    You can then put up your own post when you’re ready by clicking “+new” or “+” in the top right next to the group title. You can copy and paste the text from this post into your new post. You can also scroll through other members posts and click “Reply” to get involved.

    It is an emotional time supporting family so you might find this Macmillan information your feelings when someone has cancer helpful as well as this link getting help with your emotions.

    The Macmillan Support Line is open 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00. This service provides cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear.

    We also have our Ask an Expert section but do allow a few working days for a reply.

    Talking to people face to face can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing and support all the family.

    Do get back to me if you need further help navigating the community.

    Mike (Thehighlander)

    It always seems impossible until its done - Nelson Mandela

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