Husbands bowel cancer

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My husband had a tumor removed from his bowel three months ago he now received chemotherapy to kill any cancer that may be present..I am trying to be positive but finding it very hard he has lost over a stone in just under two weeks...I just can't look at him he looks really ill I feel really guilty for feeling like this...He is so upbeat even though he is very weak and I know he doesn't tell me the truth about how he really feels for hurting/upsetting me...I find time to cry on my own but we are always together I've tried going out but don't want to leave him..I just can't believe how much our life's have changed so quickly...He has had two cycles of chemotherapy the first he was fine but the second he has been very ill..I am so scared for him for when he starts his third next week...I just feel like running away and don't know how to help him when I am feeling like this...I thought I would be stronger and more caring... family and friends are there but I don't want to burden them... everyone is getting on with their own life's...

  • Hi  and a very warm welcome to the online community which I hope you'll find is both an informative and supportive place to be.

    I'm sorry to read that your husband has been diagnosed with bowel cancer and I know what a difficult time this will be for you both. Having a loved one dealing with cancer brings out all sorts of emotions and there are no right or wrong ways to feel.

    As the online community is divided into different support forums, I going to recommend that you join the carers only forum which is a great place to share your worries and emotions with others who have a loved one living with cancer.

    To join just click on the link I've created and, once you've joined the forum, you can start a new post in the same way as you did here and join in with existing conversations by clicking on 'reply'.

    It would be great if you could put something about your husband's diagnosis and treatment so far into your profile as it really helps others when replying to you and also when looking for someone on a similar pathway. It also means that you don't have to keep repeating yourself. To do this click on your username and then select 'Profile'. You can amend it at any time and if you're not sure what to write you can take a look at mine by clicking on my username.

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     "Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"

  • Hi, Just starting my journey with so many things in the next 11 days. Have to admit at the moment my wife and I cuddle up in bed and have a good cry. It's nothing to be ashamed of and to be honest it's helpful. We are equally vulnerable during this time. It's easy to be brave during the day but at night when everything is quite the thoughts start spinning. Be brave and have a good cry together. Life carries on so don't be afraid to go out and meet people at least you have other things to talk about when you get home again. We've said to family and friends please don't keep asking how things are. But if we need help or support we know you are there. Take care and thinking of you folks.. Maybe a group cry across tinternet