I’m in diagnosis, mum’s in treatment.

Hello all.

My mum was diagnosed with bladder cancer recently, locally advanced and requiring radical treatment. Treatment begins soon including chemotherapy and radiotherapy. 

My mum lives alone and doesn’t have much close family, and so it’ll be a team effort of both me and her friends helping out wherever we can.

I am currently also unwell and waiting for results of a cervical biopsy, I’ve had a lot of pelvic pain which is somewhat debilitating- they don’t know the cause just yet but gynaecological cancer is a possibility. 

I’m in my 20’s and to be honest I don’t feel prepared or equipped to deal with this level of stress or fear. I’m scared about how poorly my mum will become on her treatment plan, and how I can be there for her if I don’t feel well myself. Finding a balance seems difficult. 

I’m sure I’m not the only person both going through cancer and supporting a close one with cancer, but it feels like a lot, a lot to balance with your home life, full time work and life in general without falling to bits. 

Hopefully there might be someone out there with some advice or even a similar experience, I do feel so very alone at the minute. 

Thanks Pray 

  • Hello Lizzie and welcome to the macmillan community, i am so sorry to hear what you and your mum are going through, nobody is equipped to deal with the situation you find yourself in. Lizzie i looked after my mum and know how difficult physically and emotionally it is and back then i was in reasonable health, please call macmillan on 0808 808 00 00 they will be able  to help. Also there are forums on here where you will find others going through what you and your mum are, the bladder cancer forum and cervical, cancer forums. there are many wonderful people on the community who will gladly help you however they can, everyone on here has been affected by cancer either a loved one or themselves so feel free to ask anything. i know how cancer affects you emotionally everyone on here has or is going through them and if we can support you through your journey and help you we all benefit. please take care


  • Hello    Welcome to the MacMillan community - I can fully understand the emotions you are going through at this time - you are not alone in this.

    The Community is divided up into forums or chat rooms and they are cancer specific, this enables you to speak to people who have the same or similar cancers. May I suggest you join the Bladder cancer forum and the  Cervical cancer forum . To do this you can just click on the links I have provided to you and when the page opens up just click on the word "join" on the black banner at the bottom of the page. You can then either copy and paste or repost your original post and it will be seen by those specific Community members.

    You may also find two other Communities offer you some support at this time and may I recommend both the Carers only forum and the Emotional support forum  - you can also join these - joining details are as above.

    If you feel up to it and there is a local Maggie's centre in your area - you can pop in there for help - support and advice - you can find your local Maggie's on 0300 123 1801 or enquiries@maggiescentres.org or www.maggiescentres.org. they are a great set of people happy to help.

    Our help line is also open to you on 0808 808 00 00 (8am - 8pm 7 days a week).

    I hope the above helps - please feel free to contact me if I can do anything else for you.

    Best wishes - Brian.

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    Yes - I'm a Survivor! ThumbsupThumbsup tone5 :: Thank you to the NHS, MacMillan Cancer Support and members of this community.

    MacMillan Cancer Support  0808 808 00 00. (8am - 8pm 7 days a week).