Hi everyone
I'm here because my mum was diagnosed with lung cancer and brain mets in 3 places 3 months ago. Shes 82 and no option of treatment was given. She has been at home on palliative care and upto recently was doing well with the care package at home. An episode of sickness and resulting confusion (we now know because steroids weren't in her system from vomiting). She remained in hospital for 3 weeks and lost mobility during this time as well as the ongoing confusion.
I had to make the heartbreaking decision for her to go into a nursing home. She's been there bed bound for two weeks and has just received a chair to get her around the building. She hasn't settled yet and frequently says she wants to go home, or wants to escape. Some days she can't find the words to say what she wants, others she regresses to the past or thinks she's at a wedding, or on a train etc then others she's quite lucid.
I feel as unsettled as my mum, what more can I do for her? Is there additional support for people to visit her?mum has as much of her personal belongs as the room allows to make it feel like home. I've just ordered fidget blankets and some animal dvds to settle her as she loves animals. I'm there every day after work and weekends and sometimes it talking, reminiscing, or watching TV and other times just being there. I just feel at a loss what to do.
Hi Jaybird73 and welcome to the Online Community but so sorry to hear about your mum’s diagnosis.
A cancer diagnosis like this in the family can be such a challenging and stressful time but getting support from others who are dealing with the ‘exact same' support challenges can help a lot.
The Community is actually divided into Support Groups (Discussion Rooms) and when it comes to the practical and emotional challenges of supporting your mum you may benefit from joining our Carers only and Supporting someone with incurable cancer support groups where you will connect with others navigating the exact same support challenges.
To join a group first click on the “Bold Links” I have created above then once the group page opens click on “Click to Join” when the black banner appears or “Join” under “Group Tools” (this all depends on the device you are using)
You can then put up your own post when you’re ready by clicking “+new” or “+” in the top right next to the group title. You can copy and paste the text from this post into your new post. You can also scroll through other members posts and click “Reply” to get involved.
Our Support Line teams are available 7 days a week, 8am-8pm on freephone 0808 808 00 00, email or live webchat where you will find one of team there to help you out. We also have our Ask an Expert section but do allow a few working days for a reply.
Talking to people face to face can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing.
Do get back to me if you need further help.
Hi Emma, remember you can copy and paste from this post into any other post you put up ((hugs))
