My mum had breast cancer 7 years ago…..2 years ago she developed secondary breast cancer in her spine we were told it was manageable but incurable so my beautiful mum has been through so many different combinations of chemo and last year the tumours had made their way into the liver - in November the oncologist tried a new drug called Pikray side effects were diabetes and my mum struggled with side effects of insulin and blood sugar levels. The pikray didn’t work and after her last pet scan on Friday we got the devastating news that it had gone too far in liver and she has been given 3-6 months. Since coming off the pikray she’s felt so much better and looks fabulous it just makes no sense. She is the centre of my universe and my best friend…I have an 18 year old son who adores her and we do so much stuff with her and my step dad
our world has broken along with our hearts - she wants to make memories and has put the numbers out of her head and I can’t believe how brave she is - I’m a single mum but have amazing friends but I can’t hear the phrases ‘enjoy every moment with her’ ‘be strong’ because I feel the least strong I have ever felt…….my son well we all are still in shock and he keeps eating then throwing up…..I’m a teacher and thank god it’s half term but I can’t imagine going back to school right now…..I literally see my mum most weekends and after school as she and my step dad look after my dog for me……I keep taking deep breaths and saying she’s still here but I feel like I’m grieving already
sorry for unloading here but I’ve got my son some help with a counsellor he has seen before but I just don’t know how I’m going to get through this…..I keep hearing about people that have outlived the doctors numbers which obviously I want to hold on to
my mum said sorry to me on Friday that I’ve got to go through this how can she say sorry to me - she is so bloody brave and I keep thinking if she can get up and get dressed every day we’ve got to do the same but at this time for the last few nights I literally think I’m going to throw up or my head will explode - I joined this group in the hope (not hope I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy) that someone else is going through or has gone through this and has any coping strategies x
Hi Cella88and welcome to the Online Community but so sorry to hear about your mum.
A cancer diagnosis like this in the family can be such a challenging and stressful time but I do hope you will find the Community a safe place to get support from family members who are navigating the ‘exact’ same journey.
The Community is actually divided into support groups (discussion rooms) and when it comes to the practical and emotional challenges of supporting family you may also benefit from joining our general Carers only and Supporting someone with incurable cancer support groups where you will connect with others navigating the same support challenges.
If you'd like to connect in with a group click on the (Bold) Group Text Links I have created above. Once the group page opens click on the black banner that says [click to join] at the bottom, or the [Join] button under "Group tools."
You can then introduce yourself by putting up a ‘new post’ by clicking in the box near the top right with + New or + (Depending on the device you are using) and you are ready to go. You could copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.
Knowing that someone you love is incurable can be very hard and you might like to take a look at this information from Macmillan on your feelings when someone has cancer and especially this section on looking after yourself. If you're starting to struggle then it would be a good idea to have a chat with your GP.
The Macmillan Support Line is open from 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00 where you can talk with someone about specific cancer and practical information, get emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just connect with a listening ear. We also have our Ask an Expert section but do allow a few working days for a reply.
Talking to people face to face can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing and aim to give support to all the family.
Please do get back to me if you need further help.
