Hello I’ve just joined this community support for help and advice.
I had breast cancer in June 2019 and treated with chemo, radiotherapy and lumpectomy. Everything seemed to be well until June 2022 when I started to experience severe pain in my back, ribs and abdomen. Initially it was put down to a UTI or IBS but when the pain didn’t go I had a CT scan only because of my breast cancer history and it showed it had spread to my spine and partially to my right lung.
It was a shock to myself and husband as other than the back pain I felt well. I am aware of the prognosis and treatment offered and accept it and keep a positive mindset. Unfortunately my husband has found it very difficult to accept and has been quite anxious and I think suffers with depression now. He refused help, he comes to my appointments but won’t sit in the consultation for fear of more bad news. I have CT scans every 3 months and MRI’s every 4 months which sends him into downward spiral till we get the results. My MacMillan nurse has spoken to him and offered support and contacts, he always says yes he’ll do it but doesn’t or he’s feeling alot better.
I wondered if there’s anyone in the community who had experienced this and how they managed it.
TIA
Love and light
MilliMoo
Hi MimiMoo and a very warm welcome to the online community which I hope you'll find is both an informative and supportive place to be.
That must have been such a shock for both you and your husband to discover that your breast cancer had come back.
As the online community is divided up into different support groups, I'm going to suggest that you join and post in the secondary breast cancer group, which is a great place to ask your questions, share experiences and get support.
To do this just click on the link I've created which will take you to the group. You can then join and start a new post in the same way as you did here and join in with existing conversations by clicking on 'reply'.
If your husband doesn't want or feel able to speak to people face-to-face, do you think you could encourage him to join the online community where he'd been able to speak to others in the carers only group?
It would be great if you could pop something about your diagnosis and treatment so far into your profile as it really helps others when replying to you and also when looking for someone on a similar pathway. It also means that you don't have to keep repeating yourself. To do this click on your username and then select 'Profile'. You can amend it at any time and if you're not sure what to write you can take a look at mine by clicking on my username.
Wishing your husband all the best with his upcoming surgery
"Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"
