Hi everyone
last week my boyfriend was diagnosed with stage 2 brain cancer. I am struggling so much with the pain he is going through and seeing him get sicker and sicker every day; whilst knowing there’s nothing I can to stop this for him.
what makes it harder is that he’s asked me not to tell anyone, including anyone who already knows him or could know him. He asked this of me as he doesn’t want to feel pitied or for anyone in our lives to associate him with being sick. I feel automatically isolated from my friends because I’m scared to hang out with them and break down and put them in a bad position where they can’t support me. But at the same time I don’t feel capable of handling this on my own.
does anyone have experience of being asked to keep this type of information a secret? Does anyone feel as if they might want to talk with me and share their story too.
Hi and welcome to the Online Community but so sorry to hear about your boyfriends diagnosis.
A cancer diagnosis in the family can be such a challenging and stressful time but I do hope you will find the Community a safe place to get support and to ask your questions.
The Community is divided into support groups (discussion rooms) so can I recommend you join and post in our supportive Brain tumours support group. This is a safe place to talk to others who may have a similar diagnosis and treatment experience, to ask questions and get support from family members who are navigating the same journey.
If you'd like to connect in with a group click on the Green (Bold) Group link I have created above. Once the group page opens click on the black banner that says [click to join] at the bottom, or the [Join] button under "Group tools."
You can then introduce yourself by putting up a ‘new post’ by clicking in the box near the top right with + New or + (Depending on the device you are using) and you are ready to go. You could copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.
When it comes to the practical and emotional challenges of supporting family you may also benefit from joining our general Carers only Support Group where you will connect with others navigating the same support challenges.
The Macmillan Support Line is open from 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00 where you can talk with someone about specific cancer and practical information, get emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just connect with a listening ear. We also have our Ask an Expert section but do allow a few working days for a reply.
Talking to people face to face can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing and aim to give support to all the family.
Please do get back to me if you need further help.
