Hello everyone,
I am new to this group, so please excuse me for my long story. I've been bottling up my emotions for a very long time and now I feel like I want to give up.
I joined this group because I am at a point where I don't know what else to do to help my dad. He was diagnosed with SCLC in March 2022, and since then I've been through hell. I live abroad, too many miles away from him so when he was diagnosed with lung cancer I wasn't there. The only thing I was able to do is to support him financially so that he could go to the best clinic in my home country. The doctor from the clinic didn't do a good job, so we still can't be sure about the stage of my dad's cancer. His doctor has been very rude to me, he told me over the phone that my dad's life is at risk because he has the worst type of cancer and his life expectancy is 6-12 months. This is how I found out about my dad's disease. Anyway, few weeks later I went back to my home country and we started chemotherapy in April and I've been with him since then.
The first line of treatment wasn't successful, and his tumour got larger. Now, we are on the 8th round of chemo and then we'll do some scans to see if the second line of treatment worked. He hasn't done radiation or immunotherapy and I still don't know why. I've visited so many different doctors and none of them was willing to help. They think my dad's situation is terminal. My mum abandoned us couple of years ago and my brother is not around. So, there is nobody else that can support my dad- it's just me and him. He has given up on his life and doesn't care anymore. I'm still trying to help him in any possible way but I feel exhausted. He doesn't listen anymore, he is very stubborn and still smokes a lot! He's only 54 and he's all I have. I can't imagine my life without him but I don't know what else to do to help him out. I left everything I had in the UK and went back to my home country, speaking to dozens of doctors, spending all of my savings but still.. I've got people in my family that are judging me and saying that I should have done things differently. This is killing me and I feel overwhelmed. So, any advice would be very much appreciated.
Thank you,
Zoe
Hi and a very warm welcome to the online community which I hope you'll find is both an informative and supportive place to be.
I'm so sorry to read all that you and your dad have been through, and I know what a difficult time it can be when there's a cancer diagnosis in the family.
The online community is divided up into different support groups so I'm going to recommend that you join the lung cancer group, which is a great place to ask questions and share experiences about the type of cancer your dad has and the type of treatments that are available, and also the carers only group, which is a safe and supportive place to share your worries and emotions with others who are caring for a someone with cancer.
To join either or both of these groups, just click on the links I've created which will take you directly there. You can then join and start a new post in the same way as you did here and join in with existing conversations by clicking on 'reply'.
When you feel up to it, it would be great if you could pop something about your dad's diagnosis and treatment so far into your profile as it really helps others when replying to you and also when looking for someone on a similar pathway. It also means that you don't have to keep repeating yourself. To do this click on your username and then select 'Profile'. You can amend it at any time and if you're not sure what to write you can take a look at mine by clicking on my username.
x
"Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"
