Hi
I am new to this community, dealing with all that is going on is also new.
My wife of 41 years was given the news on Friday gone that she has advanced lung cancer, its beyond treatment and the time remaining is as yet unknown.
The news absolutely devastated me, I have rewritten this several times now and am struggling with such an easy task. I am not normally a very emotional person.
If I was being totally honest it was not unexpected, everyone could see something was wrong except her, and she never listens to advice. Suddenly I discovered a myriad of unexpected emotions, I felt guilt at grieving before she had actually gone. I found out on here for the first time about anticipatory grief, so am hoping that I will be able to find out a lot more.
I have joined a few specific groups so this is by way of an introduction.
I only hope that I am strong enough to face this for her sake, but god alone knows how much I dread living without her.
Paddy
Hi Paddy PaddyJ and welcome to the Community although I am sorry to hear about your wife’s diagnosis and prognosis. A cancer diagnosis like this in the family can be such a stressful and challenging time but I do hope you will find the Community a safe place to get support and ask your questions.
Indeed the Community is divided into support groups (discussion rooms) so do post in theLung Cancer group. This is a safe place to talk to others who may have a similar diagnosis, treatment experience, to ask questions and get support from family on the same journey.
If you'd like to connect in with a group click on the Green (Bold) link I have created above then once the group page opens you can then introduce yourself by putting up a ‘new post’ by clicking in the box near the top right with + New or + (Depending on the device you are using) and you are ready to go. You could copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.
When it comes to the practical and emotional challenges of supporting family you may also benefit from joining our general Carers only and Supporting someone with incurable cancer groups where you will connect with others navigating the same challenges.
Macmillan have many support services so do check out the Macmillan Support Line is open 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00. These services provide cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear. We also have our Ask an Expert section but do allow a few working days for a reply.
Talking to people face to face can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing and aim to give support to all the family.
Please do get back to me if you need further help.
All the very best.
