Hello,
I guess I'm joining the group no one wants to have to be in. My 37yr old fiance was diagnosed with medulloblastoma (an aggressive brain cancer) on sept 8th 2022. He had surgery on Tuesday to remove the tumour. It took 16hrs but they got it all. He has pretty bad side effects from the surgery with his vision and balance and weakness in his face. Hopefully some of this will improve with time. He now has a gruelling road of radiotherapy and chemotherapy to go down.
I think my main struggle is that I'm 32 and we were just getting started with our lives together. We have just bought a house and were planning to get married in the summer 2023 and then start a family etc. I feel like that can't really happen now. I have only known him for 2 years and it may sound heartless but I feel like I have a small chance to restart a better future for myself if I leave him. A future without cancer and the long term effects of the treatment. Especially scary considering it is his brain that is being messed with so much. Obviously I am having a huge internal struggle with all of these thoughts at the moment and have started some counselling.
So yes, that is me. Officially in the group no one wants to be in. Any thoughts, comments, advice is very much welcome.
Hi and welcome to the Online Community although I am sorry to hear about your fiance's diagnosis. A cancer diagnosis in the family can be such a stressful and challenging time but I do hope you will find the community a safe place to get support and ask your questions.
The Community is divided into support groups (discussion rooms) and I do see that you have already joined our Brain tumours group. This is a safe place to talk to others who may have a similar diagnosis, treatment experience, to ask questions and get support from family on the same journey.
If you'd like to connect in with a group click on the Green (Bold) link I have created above then once the group page opens you can then introduce yourself by putting up a ‘new post’ by clicking in the box near the top right with + New or + (Depending on the device you are using) and you are ready to go. You could copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.
When it comes to the practical and emotional challenges of supporting family you may also benefit from joining our general Family and friends and Carers only groups where you will connect with others navigating the same challenges.
Macmillan have many support services so do check out the Macmillan Support Line is open 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00. These services provide cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear.
We also have our Ask an Expert section but do allow a few working days for a reply.
Talking to people face to face can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing and aim to give support to all the family.
Please do get back to me if you need further help.
((hugs))
