Hey, new here and just after some advice. My husband has recently been diagnosed with cancer, just 18 months after I was! He was my absolute rock during my journey and supported me every step of the way.
I am struggling with his diagnosis, I don’t want to sound selfish, but he totally shuts me out. Won’t talk to me, disappears with no word, then has a go at me when I try to talk to him. I bet he is taking it all in? Is scared and has frustrated, but I’m really struggling. I feel lonely and it hurts that he pushes me away
I am here to support him, but how do I manage the sudden mood change and refusing to talk?
Hi and welcome to the Online Community although I am sorry to hear about your husbands diagnosis and indeed that you have been on your own cancer journey.
A cancer diagnosis in the family can be such a stressful and challenging time but I do hope you will find the community a safe place to get support and ask your questions.
The Community is divided into support groups (discussion rooms). You don’t say what type of cancer he has but if you care to have a look through this list you will find all our many dedicated cancer support groups listed.
These groups are safe places to talk to others who may have a similar diagnosis, treatment experience, to ask questions, get support and talk with others supporting family.
If you'd like to connect in with a group click on the Green (Bold) link I have created above. Once you find the group for his cancer type, open the group page then click on the black banner that says [click to join] at the bottom, or the [Join] button under "Group tools."
You can then introduce yourself by putting up a ‘new post’ by clicking in the box near the top right with + New or + (Depending on the device you are using) and you are ready to go. You could copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.
When it comes to the practical and emotional challenges of supporting someone you may also benefit from joining our general Family and friends and Carers only groups where you will connect with others navigating the same challenges.
Macmillan have many support services so do check out the Macmillan Support Line is open 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00. These services provide cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear.
We also have our Ask an Expert section but do allow a few working days for a reply.
Talking to people face to face can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing and aim to give support to all the family.
Please do get back to me if you need further help.
All the very best.
