My adult son is currently being treated for secondary kidney cancer tumours on his brain and awaiting further decisions on the tumour on his kidney. This has all happened very quickly since the recent diagnosis, only a month ago. Since undergoing radiotherapy on his brain he is now awaiting further details about his condition and future treatment. To see a once fit young man suddenly dependent on using a wheelchair, confined to the home, with little energy is very distressing for all the family. I cant imagine how he must feel - he appears on the surface to be facing up to the situation in a positive way and more concerned about his wife and children than himself. However, as his mother I am finding this all so overwhelming particularly as I lost my husband 10 years ago to the same cancer. I too am trying to deal with this in a positive way, trying to be realistic, face up to the facts etc, I want to help but not interfere too much. I feel confused and unsure what to do - for him in the first intance but also for myself so I stay strong and positive. Any suggestions?
Hi TinaAthena and welcome to the Online Community although I am sorry to hear about your son’s diagnosis. A cancer diagnosis in the family can be such a stressful and challenging time but I do hope you will find the community a safe place to get support and ask your questions.
The Community is divided into support groups (discussion rooms) so can I suggest you consider joining our supportive Kidney cancer and Brain, secondary tumours groups. These are safe places to talk to others who may have a similar diagnosis, treatment experience, to ask questions and get support.
When it comes to the practical and emotional challenges of supporting someone you may also benefit from joining our general Family and friends group where you will connect with others navigating the same challenges.
If you'd like to connect in with a group click on the Green (Bold) link(s) I have created above. Once the group page opens click on the black banner that says [click to join] at the bottom, or the [Join] button under "Group tools."
You can then introduce yourself by putting up a ‘new post’ by clicking in the box near the top right with + New or + (Depending on the device you are using) and you are ready to go. You could copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.
Macmillan have many support services so do check out the Macmillan Support Line is open 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00. These services provide cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear.
Talking to people face to face can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing supporting all the family.
Give me a shout if you need further help.
All the very best.
