Hi. I was diagnosed with cancer first in 2020 which was a bit of a shock. I'd been suffering from symptoms and problems for a while but my health has always been a bit shaky since I was in my late teens so I put it down to that. Sadly it did turn out to be cancer and since the diagnosis back in 2020 it's been a bit of a rough journey. I've got my boyfriend who looks after me and I have three beautiful little girls who I adore and treasure, they give me the strength to keep fighting this awful unwelcome guest in my body.
This year I found out that the cancer has spread yet again and I'm now terminal which has been utterly crushing and I really don't know how to feel and act now. My boyfriend knows, I was lucky he came in to the appointment with me last time. I still yet to tell my two eldest girls, my youngest wouldn't understand which is probably just as well. It's not the sort of thing I think she'd want to understand.
I feel cold and numb. I don't know how to process all this. The fact it's now incurable. It feels as if my brain is frozen now and I'm trying to put everything into focus. Does that make sense?
So now more treatments are being suggested to me to prolong my life which I am in two minds about. I really am at a loss, not sure what to do next but painfully aware that life and time is short.
Hi Renny and a very warm welcome to the online community which I hope you'll find is both an informative and supportive place to be.
It sounds like you've gone through an awful lot over the last couple of years and discovering that you're now incurable must be very difficult to get your head around.
As the online community is divided up into different support groups I'm going to recommend that you join the living with incurable cancer group which is specifically for people with an incurable or terminal diagnosis. It's a safe and supportive place where you can discuss your feelings openly.
To join just click on the link I've created and you can then join and post in the same way as you did here. You can also join in with existing conversations by clicking on 'reply'.
It would be great if you could pop something about your diagnosis and treatment so far into your profile as it really helps others when replying to you and also when looking for someone on a similar pathway. It also means that you don't have to keep repeating yourself. To do this click on your username and then select 'Profile'. You can amend it at any time and if you're not sure what to write you can take a look at mine by clicking on my username.
If you have any difficulty navigating the community just drop me a reply and I'll be pleased to help
x
"Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"
