Hi I’m new to the group but just feel I may need help and support. On Monday my mum went to the GP with stomach pain, she went to A&E and since then she is now in oncology with second stage cancer in her liver, lungs and Pancreas.. so far they are unable to find the primary cancer.
we are all in total shock. I lost my Dad 23 years ago at a young age to a Brain Cancer and I’m not ready to loose mum too.
My mum is now under a Misdisciolinary Team and having a liver biopsy today to try and find the primary but my question is does it matter if this can’t be found? We already have accepted we are likely looking at care rather than treatment as my mum doesn’t want to have treatment which makes her poorly she would rather have time with us where she is well even if it means less time
I’m so confused and shocked, there are so many different tests and questions but just no answers … I guess I just need some support
Hi and welcome to the Macmillan Online Community although I am so sorry to hear about your mum’s ongoing diagnosis.
A cancer diagnosis like this in the family can be such a stressful and challenging time but I do hope you will find the community a safe place to get support and ask your questions.
Getting a clear diagnosis in some cases can at times be very difficult and this just makes everything just harder to deal with.
The Community has various support groups (discussion rooms) and when it comes to the practical and emotional challenges of supporting someone you may benefit from joining our general Family and friends (I see you have joined) Carers only and possibly our Supporting someone with incurable cancer groups where you will connect with others in the same position.
If you'd like to connect in with a group click on the Green (Bold) link I have created above. Then once the group page opens click on the black banner that says [click to join] at the bottom, or the [Join] button under "Group tools."
You can then introduce yourself by putting up a ‘new post’ by clicking in the box near the top right with + New or + (Depending on the device you are using) and you are ready to go. You could copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.
Once you have clear idea as to what type of cancer your mum has do look through this list as you will find all our many dedicated cancer support groups listed.
Macmillan have many support platforms so do check out the Macmillan Support Line is open 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00 l
These services provide cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear. We also have our Ask an Expert section but do allow a few working days for a reply.
Talking to people face to face can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing and provide support for all the family.
Give me a shout if you need further help.
Best regards.
