Hi
Newbie here, my father in law was diagnosed with merkel cell carcinoma 2 years ago. He received immunotherapy treatment which did not work. Eventually he had 5 days of radiotherapy to shrink the tumors on his back. Since beginning of this year a lump appeared in his armpit which he had a ultrasound on Doctor wanted to send him for a biopsy but I explained he was already under cancer treatment and would it be related to that? Long story short 6 months later they have finally seen him and the cancer has rapidly spread. His arm is twice the size it was he has growths all over his right chest where the lump is which is now 20cm big. Another tumor has appeared on his leg and also his groin.
We had a appointment yesterday with a consultant to discuss radiotherapy but the outcome is now that he is going to receive the radiotherapy but is now on palliative care with only a few months left to live. I'm so angry that we've spent the past 6 months chasing doctors and consultants and he has deteriorated so quickly.
My husband doesn't like talking about it so I thought I would come on here as it might help me process things.
I'm confused to why they would offer him radiotherapy if he only has a few months left, but I think it is to help make him more comfortable. At the minute I don't know what to say or do I feel lost. I've just been looking at Father's Day cards and cried as how can I buy a Happy Father's Day card hope you have a fab day blah blah when this is has just been thrown on him.
Sorry if I'm not making sense I just need to vent at the minute I think.
Thank you for reading
Hi and a warm welcome to the Macmillan Online Community although I am so sorry to hear about your father in laws diagnosis and prognosis. A cancer diagnosis in the family like this can be a stressful and challenging time but I do hope you will find the community a safe place to get support and ask your questions.
The Community is made up of various support groups (chat rooms) and when it comes to the practical and emotional challenges of supporting someone in these circumstances you may benefit from joining our general Carers only and Supporting someone with incurable cancer groups where you will connect with others supporting family and friends
These will be safe places to talk to others, to ask questions and talk with others who are on the same pathway.
If you'd like to connect in with a group click on the Green (Bold) link I have created above. Then once the group page opens click on the black banner that says [click to join] at the bottom, or the [Join]bbutton under "Group tools."
You can then introduce yourself by putting up a ‘new post’ by clicking in the box near the top right with + New or + (Depending on the device you are using) and you are ready to go.
You could copy and paste the text from this post into your new post and as always you can reply to existing ‘Discussions’ by click [reply].
Macmillan have many support platforms so do check out the Macmillan Support Line is open 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00 or via Webchat and Emailtoo.
These services provide cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear. We also have our Ask an Expert section but do allow a few working days for a reply.
Talking to people face to face can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing and provide support for all the family.
Always around if you need further help in navigating the community.
All the very best.
