Hi I'm Verity.
I'm really struggling at the moment, physically and mentally. I'm finding the symptoms of my cancer really hard to live and deal with and now I'm suffering from depression, and that's got really bad. My cancer started of as breast cancer but it's spread, basically it's getting everywhere, every appointment is bad news now and there's no treatment happening. So basically I'm waiting for the inevitable or a miracle to happen. I've got my daughters, still very young, my boyfriend and I feel like I'm letting them all down. Haven't told my boyfriend about my latest scan results and what was said, which was basically 3-6 months. I feel if I tell him, say it aloud then it's confirmed, it's real. If I keep it to myself then it isn't happening, I don't have to face it. I know that's silly but it's the way I feel right now. Don't really know what to do, what to say. Feel like crying and screaming but just can't process this. That's why I came here, thought talking with others in the same boat might help.
Hi Verity and welcome to the Online Community although I am so sorry to hear about your diagnosis and the ongoing developments, this must have come as a shock to you.
This is such a stressful and challenging time for you but I do hope you find the community a safe place to get support and ask your questions.
The New to Community area is like our reception desk where we can signpost you on to our various cancer support groups and other services so can I recommend that you consider joining our supportive Breast cancer, Breast, secondary cancer and Living with incurable cancer - incurable patients only groups.
These are safe places to talk to others who may have a similar diagnosis, treatment experience, to ask questions and get support.
If you'd like to connect in with a group click on the Green link I have created above. Then once the page opens click on the black banner that says [click to join] at the bottom, or the [Join] button under "Group tools."
You can then introduce yourself by putting up a ‘new post’ by clicking in the box near the top right with + New or + (Depending on the device you are using) and you are ready to go.
You could copy and paste the text from this post into your new post and as always you can reply to existing ‘Discussions’ by click [reply].
The Macmillan Support Line is open 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00 or via Webchat and Email too. This service provides cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear. You may also find our Ask an Expert section helpful but do allow a few working days for a reply.
Talking to people face to face can be very helpful but during these strange times it’s not that available but do check to see if any Local Macmillan Support in your area has opened up. Do also check out for a local Maggie's Centre in your area as these folks are amazing.
Always around if you need further help in navigating the community.
All the very best ((hugs))
