Hello everyone,
My mum got diagnosed with ovarian cancer (described by health care professionals as complex) in October 2021. It was a complete shock and only got this diagnosis when she went to AnE after being refused pain killers by a doctor. It took 3 months for an official diagnosis due to where the cancer was. She has been diagnosed in stage 4 and it’s apparently an aggressive form of cancer. Shes had a bag fitted to release the pressure of the cancer. She had a round of chemo which she was allergic too, however has managed to have 2 rounds since then without the ingredient she had a reaction too. We are now waiting until to see if this has been successful at all next month.
Im not exactly sure why I’m writing this, I’m hoping I can have some sort of release from how I’v been feeling the past few days. When my mum first was diagnosed it was like grieving a person who was still alive. I managed to ignore the situation the best way possible and crack on with live every now and then. However since visiting home last week, this overwhelming feeling of grief is back, and I can’t shift it and my mum is still very much alive. Maybe I need a different perspective on the situation, or some advice to get by.
it’s hard, I don’t really have anyone to speak too. I’m lucky to know some girls in my university class are going through a similar thing but understandably no one wants to bring it up too much. I have a boyfriend but I feel like I can’t speak to him anymore, like I use to just go on about the same thing and anxieties constantly in October - December 2021, I’ve stopped now as I genuinely don’t thing he understands and I feel he just gets sick of me crying. I’m writing this at 4 o’clock in the morning as I can’t sleep. I keep having bad dreams and to be completely honest I think I’ve lost hope with the situation. I’m struggling pretty badly and I have no one to tell.
anyway, thanks for reading, once again I’m not sure what I wanted from posting this but just hoping it’ll make me feel 1% better.
Hi and welcome to the Online Community although I am so sorry to hear about your cancer mum’s journey. This is such a stressful and challenging time for everyone involved but I do hope you find the community a safe place to get support and ask your questions.
The New to Community area is like our community reception desk where we then can signpost you to our various cancer specific support groups and other services so can I recommend that in the first instant you consider joining our supportive Ovarian cancer group. This will be a safe place to talk to others who may have a similar diagnosis, treatment experience, to ask questions, get support and talk with others who are supporting family and friends on their journey.
If you'd like to connect in with a group click on the Green link I have created above. Then once the page opens click on the black banner that says [click to join] at the bottom, or the [Join] button under "Group tools."
You can then introduce yourself by putting up a ‘new post’ by clicking in the box near the top right with + New or + (Depending on the device you are using). You will then see a dropdown menu so hit ‘Chat’or ‘New here, say hello’ and you are ready to go.
You could copy and paste the text from this your first post. You can also search through existing ‘Discussions’ and click [reply] if you want to put up a comment.
When it comes to the practical challenges of supporting someone on their cancer journey you may benefit from joining our supportive Family and friends group where you will connect with others supporting family and friends
It is an emotional time supporting family so you might find this Macmillan information your feelings when someone has cancer helpful and also this on getting help with your emotions.
The Macmillan Support Line is open 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00 or via Webchat and Email too. This service provides cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear. You may also find our Ask an Expert section helpful but do allow a few working days for a reply.
Talking to people face to face can be very helpful but during these strange times it’s not that available but do check to see if any Local Macmillan Support in your area has opened up. Do also check out for a local Maggie's Centre in your area as these folks are amazing.
Always around if you need further help in navigating the community.
All the very best ((hugs))
Hi and a warm welcome to the online community which I hope you'll find is both an informative and supportive place to be.
It sounds like you have been going through a great deal since your mum was diagnosed with cancer and the feelings you describe are perfectly normal.
As the community is divided up into different support groups I'm going to recommend that you join the family and friends group which is a safe place to share your feelings and get support.
To join just click on the link I've created and then choose 'click to join' or 'join' (depending on the device you're using) on the page that opens. You can then introduce yourself and post in the same way as you did here and join in with existing conversations by clicking on 'reply'.
It would be great if you could pop something about your mum's diagnosis and treatment into your profile as it really helps others when replying to you and also when looking for someone on a similar pathway. It also means that you don't have to keep repeating yourself. To do this click on your username and then select 'Profile'. You can amend it at any time and if you're not sure what to write you can take a look at mine by clicking on my username.
If you have any difficulty navigating the community just drop me a reply and I'll be pleased to help
x
"Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"
Hi Bess and a warm welcome to the online community
I'm sorry to read that your husband has been diagnosed with lung cancer and I can see that you've already found and joined the lung cancer group. I'm sure you'll find that's a great place to ask questions and share experiences around that type of cancer.
You might also like to think about joining the carers only group which will give you the opportunity to discuss your worries and feelings with others who are caring for a loved one going through cancer treatment.
To join just click on the link I've created and then choose 'click to join' or 'join' on the page that opens. You can then introduce yourself and start a new post by clicking on + New or +, depending on the device you're using, and join in with existing conversations by clicking on 'reply'.
x
"Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"
